Well the question and the topic is a little difficult to describe so i'll do my best.
Ok, I play the trombone, I have for about 10 years. I never really payed attention to how I separate my notes, everyone always told my ';tongue'; do this do that. Recently I was wondering about it, because I found that I don't really ';tongue'; .... I started to pay a lot more attention to it, and i realized I never use my tongue.
No one has ever said anything about my sound, or anything, people have told me I have a really good sound, and that I play fairly well. By no means am I really good or anything, but i've made jazz all state etc.
I tried looking it up but i can not find anything. The only good way i've found for describing what I do is this:
If anyone whistles; when you whistle how do you separate your notes? ... Yeah thats how I do it on the trombone, or any instrument i play.
It is kind of like I separate the note with my diaphragm or throat? basically by just stopping my air flow and restarting it.
This doesn't cause me any trouble, I am just merely curious as to what I am doing.
Now mind you, I can separate the notes just as fast if not faster then someone double tonguing, I can play staccato legato etc.
My main question here is, does anyone know exactly what I am doing? Is it a really bad habit? And do you know anyone else who does this?Question about separating notes on a instrument.?
I think your analysis is sound, I am of the mind that if it ain't broke, don't fix it, and am willing to back this up with any number of pictures of Dizzy Gillespie playing the trumpet with his cheeks puffed out. But I would experiment with orthodox tonguing techniques if I were you, just to see what the differences in effect and articulation are.
Oh, and I would repost this question in the human physiology section.Question about separating notes on a instrument.?
Your question has been put in science and mathmatics%26gt;engineering which it obviously is not about. If you are looking for an answer I would repost in Music
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Can you teach someone how to whistle with two fingers in the mouth, (Real Loud)?
I can whistle, but, not real loud. I would love to hear how it's done, but, I need more info than stick 2 fingers in your mouth and blow. Where do the fingers go, which shape should I try to make of my mouth, what to do with the tongue, how hard do you blow. Who ever can describe it to the point that a high pitched whistle comes out of my mouth gets the 10 points and my sincere gratitude!Can you teach someone how to whistle with two fingers in the mouth, (Real Loud)?
hi,
i hav mastered the whistle
get ur 2 fingers 2gether.
poke out ur tounge a little bit.
gently fold tongue into backwards C.
put fingers on top of tounge and just touch the fingers together.
dont just blow. blow like your whistleing.
thxCan you teach someone how to whistle with two fingers in the mouth, (Real Loud)?
i dont know
i wanna learn too
nopeWhat are the pros and cons of hosting the Olympics in a city new hair styles
hi,
i hav mastered the whistle
get ur 2 fingers 2gether.
poke out ur tounge a little bit.
gently fold tongue into backwards C.
put fingers on top of tounge and just touch the fingers together.
dont just blow. blow like your whistleing.
thxCan you teach someone how to whistle with two fingers in the mouth, (Real Loud)?
i dont know
i wanna learn too
nope
Call me a poet as I've written another? -- Thoughts?
***THOUGH IT DOESN'T RHYME TOO MUCH, IT HAS A RHYTHM LIKE A POEM***
[Title] Call Me
Call me by name and in time, I'll come running
Call me in song and my heart writes the words
Call me in stillness and time will be halted
Call me in kindness as evilness fades
Call me by whistling sweetly, a tune
Call me and see where my face should appear
Call me in spring time, my sunlit eyes wink
Call me for summer, my hands will applaud
Call me for autumn, I fall like an oak leaf
Call me for winter, your love is so warm
Call me away and I'd go with you always
Call me back home and I'll leave you no more
Call me through daylight, I shine like a tall flame
Call me from darkness, I'll find you again
Call me in tongues I have not ever known
Call me in speech with an accent that swoons
Call me with smiles, full of laughter and grace
Call me like I've been too far from your heart
Call me if trouble should come out of nowhere
Call me if stalkers should chase you around
Call me if people have criticized you
Call me if jokers are making you sad
Call me if you are becoming one of them
Call me if tears have come out of their lies
Call me though you are three hours away
Call me regardless of distance and fear
Call me when God tells you ';He is the one.';
Call me when God says that ';You will find love.';
Call me for hours and hours on end
Call me from twilight till dusk and the end
Call me, you can if you write me a song
Call me, you must if we know that we're strong
Call me, you surely can tell by my face
Call me, you knowingly blush, turned away
Call me, you cushion my head when it falls
Call me, and I'll be unconscious once more
Call me and listen to delightful drumming
Call me and feel that distinguishing beat
Call me and see how the waltz moves the dancer
Call me and touch every tear on my face
Call me and see, my ice cream cone is melting
Call me and know love is hotter than fire
Call me should loved ones go suddenly onward
Call me when friends would leave you all alone
Call me if blissfulness sows its own seed
Call me when lilacs would blossom and flower
Call me to wash the mud off of your feet
Call me to kiss the blood off of your lips
Call me on Gondolas, strolling through Venice
Call me from high steel towers in New York
Call me beneath canvased ceilings in Rome
Call me for a rendevous in Paris
Call me, we'll wait for nobody to come here
Call me, we'll share the love under the stars
Call me at night in a candle lit ball room
Call me by day in a flowery meadow
Call me at night from the great stage of heaven
Call me by day in the seats of cliffed mountains
Call me at night by the light of the moon
Call me by day at the stroke of high noon
Call me, my sweet heart, I follow your footsteps
Call me, my darling, I race down the hall
Call me, my princess, what ever you've wanted
Call me, my dear and for you, I will fly
Call me, but not when I'm happily calling
Call me, but not when in my dreams, I'm falling
Call me and I will be calling you tooCall me a poet as I've written another? -- Thoughts?
I feel that 'call me' was used far too much. While reading it, I got bored with always reading 'Call me';..........It would have a greater emphasis with less usage.
e.g.: Call me by name, and in time, I'll come running
While my heart inscribes your words in song
And time is halted by the stillness of your words.
Call me in kindness and evil will fade away
And sing to me your whistling melody
And see where I am cast by such sonic power.
Call me, in the spring.....................etc......etc.Call me a poet as I've written another? -- Thoughts?
i really don't like some poems but that was wonderful!!!
That's a wonderful poem! You're a great writer...poet(:
I wish you like for the mere future(:
I think you'll be even more successful.
My thoughts on this is it's beautiful, You must have spent awhile on writing this one. It is put together very well. I loved it 10/10 and a million star for you.
[Title] Call Me
Call me by name and in time, I'll come running
Call me in song and my heart writes the words
Call me in stillness and time will be halted
Call me in kindness as evilness fades
Call me by whistling sweetly, a tune
Call me and see where my face should appear
Call me in spring time, my sunlit eyes wink
Call me for summer, my hands will applaud
Call me for autumn, I fall like an oak leaf
Call me for winter, your love is so warm
Call me away and I'd go with you always
Call me back home and I'll leave you no more
Call me through daylight, I shine like a tall flame
Call me from darkness, I'll find you again
Call me in tongues I have not ever known
Call me in speech with an accent that swoons
Call me with smiles, full of laughter and grace
Call me like I've been too far from your heart
Call me if trouble should come out of nowhere
Call me if stalkers should chase you around
Call me if people have criticized you
Call me if jokers are making you sad
Call me if you are becoming one of them
Call me if tears have come out of their lies
Call me though you are three hours away
Call me regardless of distance and fear
Call me when God tells you ';He is the one.';
Call me when God says that ';You will find love.';
Call me for hours and hours on end
Call me from twilight till dusk and the end
Call me, you can if you write me a song
Call me, you must if we know that we're strong
Call me, you surely can tell by my face
Call me, you knowingly blush, turned away
Call me, you cushion my head when it falls
Call me, and I'll be unconscious once more
Call me and listen to delightful drumming
Call me and feel that distinguishing beat
Call me and see how the waltz moves the dancer
Call me and touch every tear on my face
Call me and see, my ice cream cone is melting
Call me and know love is hotter than fire
Call me should loved ones go suddenly onward
Call me when friends would leave you all alone
Call me if blissfulness sows its own seed
Call me when lilacs would blossom and flower
Call me to wash the mud off of your feet
Call me to kiss the blood off of your lips
Call me on Gondolas, strolling through Venice
Call me from high steel towers in New York
Call me beneath canvased ceilings in Rome
Call me for a rendevous in Paris
Call me, we'll wait for nobody to come here
Call me, we'll share the love under the stars
Call me at night in a candle lit ball room
Call me by day in a flowery meadow
Call me at night from the great stage of heaven
Call me by day in the seats of cliffed mountains
Call me at night by the light of the moon
Call me by day at the stroke of high noon
Call me, my sweet heart, I follow your footsteps
Call me, my darling, I race down the hall
Call me, my princess, what ever you've wanted
Call me, my dear and for you, I will fly
Call me, but not when I'm happily calling
Call me, but not when in my dreams, I'm falling
Call me and I will be calling you tooCall me a poet as I've written another? -- Thoughts?
I feel that 'call me' was used far too much. While reading it, I got bored with always reading 'Call me';..........It would have a greater emphasis with less usage.
e.g.: Call me by name, and in time, I'll come running
While my heart inscribes your words in song
And time is halted by the stillness of your words.
Call me in kindness and evil will fade away
And sing to me your whistling melody
And see where I am cast by such sonic power.
Call me, in the spring.....................etc......etc.Call me a poet as I've written another? -- Thoughts?
i really don't like some poems but that was wonderful!!!
That's a wonderful poem! You're a great writer...poet(:
I wish you like for the mere future(:
I think you'll be even more successful.
My thoughts on this is it's beautiful, You must have spent awhile on writing this one. It is put together very well. I loved it 10/10 and a million star for you.
Another love poem..well..for lovers of all ages...what do you think?
During October whilst the clouds whistled through
My heart ran like black stallions across golden plains
Their hooves floating amidst flowers made rich of hue
Pink petals strumming their magnificent twirling manes
Our hands conjoin icy blue diamond rings winking
From where the Sun’s passionate gaze pierces its soul
Our voices with so much passion now forever singing
Running through these fields where dragon flies lull
How can love like ours be so mysterious yet daunting?
That makes us masters of our romantic destinies
Our past ghosts fleeting within memories so haunting
Must rest amongst grave yards forgiving twinkling seas
My knees are heavy whilst my breath remains calm
Gazing into your light deep-set brown eyes weeping
Such loving persuasion eagerly awaits within my palm
My mind twirling like nervous coins silently leaping
Forward into a magical ocean of courageous aspiration
This old superstition, “Luck, bestowed only upon fools”
Your face glowing like yellow candle-light burning elation
“Yes!” I jump for joy ignoring as gravity pushes and pulls
My physicality symbolizes mortality amongst immortals
Whilst this bitter entity brings me slowly down to earth
Distant sound of bees humming our tune silently chortles
My heart elaborating upon happiness from ashes rebirth
My beating heart spinning, one floating world of its own
While we roll around in the fields kissing and laughing
Where bountiful flowers carrying pollen of love are known
Holding your hand running, “My love, where art thou going?”
My fingers lightly press against your lips, “Let love show you”
Your amber hair flowing like mermaids against the obscure sky
Wherein we come upon a lake, therein lies a boat just for you
I take your hand, “Gentle now,” white full moon drifting nigh
My arms rowing, paddles rippling across stilled quiet waters
Your smile gleaming rich of wondrous desire and loving care
Shimmering bars swim across waves moonlight’s daughters
My breath is held, “I know nothing of a kiss, yet shall we share?”
The paddles fall against the boat’s wooden carcass with a thud
Angels speak, “true passion for love never expiates”
Crickets chirping within the wound of the howling wind
Green frogs croaking and sitting upon soft dinner plates
My hands like pick axes mining what they hope to find
Golden breasts, so tender and lonesome, needing attention
Curiosity for thirsting to know their secretive desires
A magician for love, yet again, disappearing contention
Our tongues clash and dance around romantic fires
The boat is rocking and tipping and mocking our joy
You grab my arms, clenching tight, suddenly, splash!
We both fall into the cool water, scattering orange coy
We laugh and giggle and climb reluctantly into the boat
The horizon painted the river pinkish-red, “What a view”
Thanks for your comments. I really love my girlfriend. Ella es mi inspiracion! =] Spanish for: She is my inspiration. I am also going to be posting poems in spanish! Look forward to that. Que buena duerma!Another love poem..well..for lovers of all ages...what do you think?
A very enjoyable read. You had me with ';black stallions across golden plains'; (strength) and ';Pink petals'; (sensitivity). Enough visuals to last a life time. Similarities were quite refreshing - especially liked the green frogs on ';soft dinner plates';. Bravo ♥
http://images.google.com/url?source=imgr…Another love poem..well..for lovers of all ages...what do you think?
Wow thats really, really good
You've 'got it bad' young man!
It is a beautiful poem and should impress your young lady, but remember that love is blind.
I wish you, both, every success.
My heart ran like black stallions across golden plains
Their hooves floating amidst flowers made rich of hue
Pink petals strumming their magnificent twirling manes
Our hands conjoin icy blue diamond rings winking
From where the Sun’s passionate gaze pierces its soul
Our voices with so much passion now forever singing
Running through these fields where dragon flies lull
How can love like ours be so mysterious yet daunting?
That makes us masters of our romantic destinies
Our past ghosts fleeting within memories so haunting
Must rest amongst grave yards forgiving twinkling seas
My knees are heavy whilst my breath remains calm
Gazing into your light deep-set brown eyes weeping
Such loving persuasion eagerly awaits within my palm
My mind twirling like nervous coins silently leaping
Forward into a magical ocean of courageous aspiration
This old superstition, “Luck, bestowed only upon fools”
Your face glowing like yellow candle-light burning elation
“Yes!” I jump for joy ignoring as gravity pushes and pulls
My physicality symbolizes mortality amongst immortals
Whilst this bitter entity brings me slowly down to earth
Distant sound of bees humming our tune silently chortles
My heart elaborating upon happiness from ashes rebirth
My beating heart spinning, one floating world of its own
While we roll around in the fields kissing and laughing
Where bountiful flowers carrying pollen of love are known
Holding your hand running, “My love, where art thou going?”
My fingers lightly press against your lips, “Let love show you”
Your amber hair flowing like mermaids against the obscure sky
Wherein we come upon a lake, therein lies a boat just for you
I take your hand, “Gentle now,” white full moon drifting nigh
My arms rowing, paddles rippling across stilled quiet waters
Your smile gleaming rich of wondrous desire and loving care
Shimmering bars swim across waves moonlight’s daughters
My breath is held, “I know nothing of a kiss, yet shall we share?”
The paddles fall against the boat’s wooden carcass with a thud
Angels speak, “true passion for love never expiates”
Crickets chirping within the wound of the howling wind
Green frogs croaking and sitting upon soft dinner plates
My hands like pick axes mining what they hope to find
Golden breasts, so tender and lonesome, needing attention
Curiosity for thirsting to know their secretive desires
A magician for love, yet again, disappearing contention
Our tongues clash and dance around romantic fires
The boat is rocking and tipping and mocking our joy
You grab my arms, clenching tight, suddenly, splash!
We both fall into the cool water, scattering orange coy
We laugh and giggle and climb reluctantly into the boat
The horizon painted the river pinkish-red, “What a view”
Thanks for your comments. I really love my girlfriend. Ella es mi inspiracion! =] Spanish for: She is my inspiration. I am also going to be posting poems in spanish! Look forward to that. Que buena duerma!Another love poem..well..for lovers of all ages...what do you think?
A very enjoyable read. You had me with ';black stallions across golden plains'; (strength) and ';Pink petals'; (sensitivity). Enough visuals to last a life time. Similarities were quite refreshing - especially liked the green frogs on ';soft dinner plates';. Bravo ♥
http://images.google.com/url?source=imgr…Another love poem..well..for lovers of all ages...what do you think?
Wow thats really, really good
You've 'got it bad' young man!
It is a beautiful poem and should impress your young lady, but remember that love is blind.
I wish you, both, every success.
A poem for my newer Y!A friends..please read and tell me what you think?
During October whilst the clouds whistled through
My heart ran like black stallions across golden plains
Their hooves floating amidst flowers made rich of hue
Pink petals strumming their magnificent twirling manes
Our hands conjoin icy blue diamond rings winking
From where the Sun’s passionate gaze pierces its soul
Our voices with so much passion now forever singing
Running through these fields where dragon flies lull
How can love like ours be so mysterious yet daunting?
That makes us masters of our romantic destinies
Our past ghosts fleeting within memories so haunting
Must rest amongst grave yards forgiving twinkling seas
My knees are heavy whilst my breath remains calm
Gazing into your light deep-set brown eyes weeping
Such loving persuasion eagerly awaits within my palm
My mind twirling like nervous coins silently leaping
Forward into a magical ocean of courageous aspiration
This old superstition, “Luck, bestowed only upon fools”
Your face glowing like yellow candle-light burning elation
“Yes!” I jump for joy ignoring as gravity pushes and pulls
My physicality symbolizes mortality amongst immortals
Whilst this bitter entity brings me slowly down to earth
Distant sound of bees humming our tune silently chortles
My heart elaborating upon happiness from ashes rebirth
My beating heart spinning, one floating world of its own
While we roll around in the fields kissing and laughing
Where bountiful flowers carrying pollen of love are known
Holding your hand running, “My love, where art thou going?”
My fingers lightly press against your lips, “Let love show you”
Your amber hair flowing like mermaids against the obscure sky
Wherein we come upon a lake, therein lies a boat just for you
I take your hand, “Gentle now,” white full moon drifting nigh
My arms rowing, paddles rippling across stilled quiet waters
Your smile gleaming rich of wondrous desire and loving care
Shimmering bars swim across waves moonlight’s daughters
Breath held, “I know nothing of a kiss, yet shall we share?”
The paddles fall against the boat’s wooden carcass with a thud
Angels speak, “true passion for love never expiates”
Crickets chirping within the wound of the howling wind
Green frogs croaking and sitting upon soft dinner plates
My hands like pick axes mining what they hope to find
Golden breasts, so tender and lonesome, needing attention
Curiosity for thirsting to know their secretive desires
A magician for love, yet again, disappearing contention
Our tongues clash and dance around romantic fires
The boat is rocking and tipping and mocking our joy
You grab my arms, clenching tight, suddenly, splash!
We both fall into the cool water, scattering orange coy
We laugh and giggle and climb reluctantly into the boat
The horizon painted the river pinkish-red, “What a view”
I posted this poem a long time ago but since then I have obtained newer YA friends so Ill put it up for them and those who have not seen it. Thanks for your reviews=]
Just something I wrote in my spare time
during my history class at school, last year.
Hope you liked it=]
--------------------------------------…
I am going to write another long poem.
This is one of my longer ones.
But recently I have been taking walks
in the park going out and writing little
tabs of inspiration to be used for my
next long one. POst it soon.
Again thanks!!!A poem for my newer Y!A friends..please read and tell me what you think?
amazing....i love the metaphors and details. The tad bit of humor (intended or not) at the end was a great touch.A poem for my newer Y!A friends..please read and tell me what you think?
Wow this is such an inspiring thing i should no years of experience hoope to hear more
keep em kuming! ;))
Wow
Just...wow.
That is an amazing poem.
I loved it.
i loved it or at least the first 3 words i read of it but i thinks its good you make great poems!!
My heart ran like black stallions across golden plains
Their hooves floating amidst flowers made rich of hue
Pink petals strumming their magnificent twirling manes
Our hands conjoin icy blue diamond rings winking
From where the Sun’s passionate gaze pierces its soul
Our voices with so much passion now forever singing
Running through these fields where dragon flies lull
How can love like ours be so mysterious yet daunting?
That makes us masters of our romantic destinies
Our past ghosts fleeting within memories so haunting
Must rest amongst grave yards forgiving twinkling seas
My knees are heavy whilst my breath remains calm
Gazing into your light deep-set brown eyes weeping
Such loving persuasion eagerly awaits within my palm
My mind twirling like nervous coins silently leaping
Forward into a magical ocean of courageous aspiration
This old superstition, “Luck, bestowed only upon fools”
Your face glowing like yellow candle-light burning elation
“Yes!” I jump for joy ignoring as gravity pushes and pulls
My physicality symbolizes mortality amongst immortals
Whilst this bitter entity brings me slowly down to earth
Distant sound of bees humming our tune silently chortles
My heart elaborating upon happiness from ashes rebirth
My beating heart spinning, one floating world of its own
While we roll around in the fields kissing and laughing
Where bountiful flowers carrying pollen of love are known
Holding your hand running, “My love, where art thou going?”
My fingers lightly press against your lips, “Let love show you”
Your amber hair flowing like mermaids against the obscure sky
Wherein we come upon a lake, therein lies a boat just for you
I take your hand, “Gentle now,” white full moon drifting nigh
My arms rowing, paddles rippling across stilled quiet waters
Your smile gleaming rich of wondrous desire and loving care
Shimmering bars swim across waves moonlight’s daughters
Breath held, “I know nothing of a kiss, yet shall we share?”
The paddles fall against the boat’s wooden carcass with a thud
Angels speak, “true passion for love never expiates”
Crickets chirping within the wound of the howling wind
Green frogs croaking and sitting upon soft dinner plates
My hands like pick axes mining what they hope to find
Golden breasts, so tender and lonesome, needing attention
Curiosity for thirsting to know their secretive desires
A magician for love, yet again, disappearing contention
Our tongues clash and dance around romantic fires
The boat is rocking and tipping and mocking our joy
You grab my arms, clenching tight, suddenly, splash!
We both fall into the cool water, scattering orange coy
We laugh and giggle and climb reluctantly into the boat
The horizon painted the river pinkish-red, “What a view”
I posted this poem a long time ago but since then I have obtained newer YA friends so Ill put it up for them and those who have not seen it. Thanks for your reviews=]
Just something I wrote in my spare time
during my history class at school, last year.
Hope you liked it=]
--------------------------------------…
I am going to write another long poem.
This is one of my longer ones.
But recently I have been taking walks
in the park going out and writing little
tabs of inspiration to be used for my
next long one. POst it soon.
Again thanks!!!A poem for my newer Y!A friends..please read and tell me what you think?
amazing....i love the metaphors and details. The tad bit of humor (intended or not) at the end was a great touch.A poem for my newer Y!A friends..please read and tell me what you think?
Wow this is such an inspiring thing i should no years of experience hoope to hear more
keep em kuming! ;))
Wow
Just...wow.
That is an amazing poem.
I loved it.
i loved it or at least the first 3 words i read of it but i thinks its good you make great poems!!
Does my short story sound like ';A'; material?
Pre-Ap english; Sophomore.
Does this sound like an A to you?
';Vendetta';
Whitney Claypool
A tear that wasn’t Luna’s streamed down her milky complexion as she lay crumpled and bloody upon the dance studio floor. Her auburn hair swept across the wood, soaking up most of the evidence of murder. With an alkaline taste on his tongue and the acrid smell of death in his nose, Artemis stooped down to the wintry dance floor. He picked up the only remnant of his past and present, but no longer his future. Luna, his twin, was dead - killed in cold blood. ';The Haven';, a grimy group of 24th Chromosome carrier killers, were behind the mystery the cops would soon overlook. Battle plans, weapons, and hovercrafts danced across the back of his swollen, bloodshot eyes. He lifted his sister up and turned to carry the carcass out the door, when his hip hit the old Spanish stand holding Luna’s prize possession: the indestructible crystal vase our mother gave her before she died. It was as if time had slowed down as the vase tumbled over the edge. Only this time, the vase shattered into a thousand pieces, cascading across the floor. Never before has the vase broken when it was dropped. Never before has the wrong twin been murdered.
The raging wind licked across my face as I stepped out into the desolate alley. The sky promised the fall of rain, sooner than later. As I walked toward the congested group of tourists and pedestrians, an audible hiss of “Morte,” was heard from behind one of the massive tubes that led to our recycling bins. “Death,” says Rye, as she steps out of the dark abyss, “is a cliché now-a-days. Punishment by injection is no punishment. It’s a coward’s way out.” She sneers her last sentence, taking in my protective stance from by the street. “How will you die, Artemis?”
The remainder of The Haven emerged from darkness that swallowed them whole. Among the elite group, Martin, Jane, and Damon stood before me. The portly one of the three, Martin, was shaking with anticipation for the next kill. His dagger shone with the blood of my sister, glistening under the pale moonlight. A strangled cry released from my sandpaper throat at the sight. I laid Luna on the cold street, taking my jacket off and wrapping it around her slim figure.
Martin lunged toward me with his inferior instrument of death. He sliced away, but his sloth-like movements allowed me to deflect the blows and stab him in his heart. Rye let out a strangled cry as she flew at me with everything she had. I removed Martin’s sword from his holster and met Rye’s with just barely enough time. In full attack mode, I lunged at her, pouring out all the hatred and loathe I felt for them. Metal struck, eliciting sparks from our force. Rye spun around and dived for my abdomen, but I was too quick. Taking advantage of her confusion, I used the fall to my advantage and lashed back out, slicing a huge long gash along Rye’s chest. Her clothing was in tatters, and skin covered in blood as she dropped to the ground.
My cry of glory was cut off short by an ear-piercing gun shot. Damon had shot Jane right in her head, laughing a malevolent laugh as he did it. His icy gaze met mine. “She was in the way! Besides, she couldn’t even kill your precious Luna. She couldn’t stand the sight of her. After all, you are-”
But he never finished his sentence. Instead, he hurled a pointed switchblade right into my liver, causing my vision to slowly turn black. There was a sweltering pain in my side that spread throughout my veins. It felt as if someone had lit my body on fire, scorching my insides and out as I fell to the earth. My piercing cry was drowned out by a loud ringing in my ears. Damon’s shoes clicked as he walked away from the alley, whistling to a foreign, yet familiar seven note tune.
My shouts came out as gasps as I lay frozen on the ground. The throbbing pain slowly subsided from my body and I was finally able to move. My movements were now facile, as if my 24th Chromosome had never been initiated. The lesion was now healed, no scar or blemish left in its place. I could taste the mellow and salty air around me, smell its fragrant aroma of life that came from the evening rain. My senses were heightened; everything was. I smiled to myself as I realized that, even though Damon was still breathing, so was I. I, Artemis Lyron Pentsly, was now immortal. But my grandeur was short lived as reality came back into focus. Luna needed a proper burial.
I carried my sister into the dark alley way, not looking back at the bodies that led to her death.Does my short story sound like ';A'; material?
Yes. That is stirring and disturbing. I was so upset! And it was exciting. Your choice of language is excellent, and I enjoyed all the sensory images you portrayed (eg: fragrant aroma of life that came from the evening rain...someone had lit my body on fire, scorching my insides...) The opening image of a dead dancer with her hair spread across the floor was heartwrenching.
Excellent job. I hope you get published some day!
Does this sound like an A to you?
';Vendetta';
Whitney Claypool
A tear that wasn’t Luna’s streamed down her milky complexion as she lay crumpled and bloody upon the dance studio floor. Her auburn hair swept across the wood, soaking up most of the evidence of murder. With an alkaline taste on his tongue and the acrid smell of death in his nose, Artemis stooped down to the wintry dance floor. He picked up the only remnant of his past and present, but no longer his future. Luna, his twin, was dead - killed in cold blood. ';The Haven';, a grimy group of 24th Chromosome carrier killers, were behind the mystery the cops would soon overlook. Battle plans, weapons, and hovercrafts danced across the back of his swollen, bloodshot eyes. He lifted his sister up and turned to carry the carcass out the door, when his hip hit the old Spanish stand holding Luna’s prize possession: the indestructible crystal vase our mother gave her before she died. It was as if time had slowed down as the vase tumbled over the edge. Only this time, the vase shattered into a thousand pieces, cascading across the floor. Never before has the vase broken when it was dropped. Never before has the wrong twin been murdered.
The raging wind licked across my face as I stepped out into the desolate alley. The sky promised the fall of rain, sooner than later. As I walked toward the congested group of tourists and pedestrians, an audible hiss of “Morte,” was heard from behind one of the massive tubes that led to our recycling bins. “Death,” says Rye, as she steps out of the dark abyss, “is a cliché now-a-days. Punishment by injection is no punishment. It’s a coward’s way out.” She sneers her last sentence, taking in my protective stance from by the street. “How will you die, Artemis?”
The remainder of The Haven emerged from darkness that swallowed them whole. Among the elite group, Martin, Jane, and Damon stood before me. The portly one of the three, Martin, was shaking with anticipation for the next kill. His dagger shone with the blood of my sister, glistening under the pale moonlight. A strangled cry released from my sandpaper throat at the sight. I laid Luna on the cold street, taking my jacket off and wrapping it around her slim figure.
Martin lunged toward me with his inferior instrument of death. He sliced away, but his sloth-like movements allowed me to deflect the blows and stab him in his heart. Rye let out a strangled cry as she flew at me with everything she had. I removed Martin’s sword from his holster and met Rye’s with just barely enough time. In full attack mode, I lunged at her, pouring out all the hatred and loathe I felt for them. Metal struck, eliciting sparks from our force. Rye spun around and dived for my abdomen, but I was too quick. Taking advantage of her confusion, I used the fall to my advantage and lashed back out, slicing a huge long gash along Rye’s chest. Her clothing was in tatters, and skin covered in blood as she dropped to the ground.
My cry of glory was cut off short by an ear-piercing gun shot. Damon had shot Jane right in her head, laughing a malevolent laugh as he did it. His icy gaze met mine. “She was in the way! Besides, she couldn’t even kill your precious Luna. She couldn’t stand the sight of her. After all, you are-”
But he never finished his sentence. Instead, he hurled a pointed switchblade right into my liver, causing my vision to slowly turn black. There was a sweltering pain in my side that spread throughout my veins. It felt as if someone had lit my body on fire, scorching my insides and out as I fell to the earth. My piercing cry was drowned out by a loud ringing in my ears. Damon’s shoes clicked as he walked away from the alley, whistling to a foreign, yet familiar seven note tune.
My shouts came out as gasps as I lay frozen on the ground. The throbbing pain slowly subsided from my body and I was finally able to move. My movements were now facile, as if my 24th Chromosome had never been initiated. The lesion was now healed, no scar or blemish left in its place. I could taste the mellow and salty air around me, smell its fragrant aroma of life that came from the evening rain. My senses were heightened; everything was. I smiled to myself as I realized that, even though Damon was still breathing, so was I. I, Artemis Lyron Pentsly, was now immortal. But my grandeur was short lived as reality came back into focus. Luna needed a proper burial.
I carried my sister into the dark alley way, not looking back at the bodies that led to her death.Does my short story sound like ';A'; material?
Yes. That is stirring and disturbing. I was so upset! And it was exciting. Your choice of language is excellent, and I enjoyed all the sensory images you portrayed (eg: fragrant aroma of life that came from the evening rain...someone had lit my body on fire, scorching my insides...) The opening image of a dead dancer with her hair spread across the floor was heartwrenching.
Excellent job. I hope you get published some day!
Should I stay friends with her? Read DESC.?
READ THIS ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
OK... I have a best friend. Lets call her... Mia. Mia and have been on and off BF's for almost a year and a half I think. And here are some problems I have with her:
-We would make plans them instead of me in them she would take a diff friend. After we talked it through and how fun it was going to be.
-When she gets mad at me she can never handle things herself. She has her ';real'; friends with as she would say and then act all tough.
- Her and I both talk about how we don't like the ';mexicans'; standing around like lows and home depot and by the gas stations because they are like whistling and junk. She has the nerve to say that '; i am a hypocrite because I said I HATE MEXICANS and I thought spanish was stupid'; she said that after I told her I was learning spanish. I've never said I hated mexicans no one in the right mind we be so dumb to say that about any race. Yeah.
-Her mom is like rough with her and like kinda does drugs and just got put into a mental home after mia found her o n their staircase playing with some lint... not kidding.
-Always questions our friendship like that maybe we shouldn't be friends. I heard if your real bff's no need to question it.
-People called her a racist at my school. like HEKKKKKAAAAA people like one of my other friends and ya. I don't really like racists.
-She talks about me like puts it out there and tells me that she talks about me behind my back. Ok then?
-If we were both sneaking around doing something bad she would blaim it on me. MULTIPLE times that has happened. then i would call her and ask her why she did that and the cat would catch her tongue. she'd be speechless.
-If i get mad at her -which i do for good reasons- she would ignore it and say this'; well... shouldn't i be mad at you too? you do things to make me mad.'; and im over here like ?????????????????? we ain't talking bout that we talking bout this!!!!!!!!!!so if i get mad at her she gotta be mad at me. that just dont make no sense!
-She has stolen from me, like my binder that I put my art in. and some pics of my family, and collected bookmarks. she would steal it. yeah. and more.
-i cant trust her with any secret what so ever she would just blabber it all out.
-i always give her stuff and am their for her when her mom acts up and shes sad and she starts cryin over some boy she barely know. then she say she got big plans fr us then something always pops up.
-she talks about her frinds behind their backs to me and then she would tell em that i was talking too. when i know dang well to keep my mouth shut!
-she doesnt make good descisions. i mean she dont smoke drink drugs she just yeah. not good descisions.
she would be the hippoctie cuz she says she hater perfume she wears that shnyt. she say she dont like mac n cheese that has powder she eats it anyway at school. she say she aint racist thats not what im hearin. she said she hates when people dont say by on the phone. she did that to me 20 mins ago she mad at me right now? and she started it by saying im a hippacrit. which is no the truth
-she makes up excuses to get off the phone with me saying sumtin lyk ';my mom is yellin at me im grounded for not takin out the trash.'; when i know she told me she say that to her other frinds.
-we make plans to go shoppin she wants to go wit her other frind then shye asks me when i tell her im going shoppin if she can come.
-we gonna do the talent show together, she wanna go do it wit some other chikk!
-MORE!!!!!!!!!!
-im not trying to make her look bad but she does do these things.
the new school year is starting and i want to know i should still be best friends with her. i dont really want to be just friends now that i think about it. she always comes running back to me when something. is wrong. i dont like one of her frineds and i start hangin wit em she be gettin HEKKKKA mad at me...
tell me what i shou;ld do please. i need yalls opinion thank you!!Should I stay friends with her? Read DESC.?
i would just stop hanging out with her..when school starts just stop talking to her, stop phone calls and ect..just move on she sounds like she has allot of problems..not saying your perfect but, friends are supposed to make you feel good not bad..sometimes you get stuck in a rutt and forget that but, its true ..Should I stay friends with her? Read DESC.?
no way. maybe you could be ';aqquaintances.'; but if she is going to treat you like that, DUMP HER
i Stopped Reading At You Hate Mexicans Standing At Lowes And Home Depot; Not All Mexicans Whistle Just The Pervert Ones And That's Really RACIST What You And Your Friend Says About TheM; REALLY A lot Of Trashy White GuysWhistlee And Are Pervs And Jack Off To Girls WalkingIn Frontt Of Them. So Don't Hate On Mexicans Ohkay And There At Lowes AndHome Depot Because They Fix There Shyt And Aren't Lazy And Hire Other People To Do There Yard Work/Work; You Are a HATER %26amp; a Racist Ha Wow And You Have Friends? Thats Suprising
You shouldn't hav to be worried to tell ur best friends secrets or hav to deal with her talking crap behind ur back. I hav a friend that sounds like ur best friend and we only hang out lyk strangers..we definitely aren't friends. So...no you shouldn't stay friends with her. U can talk to her but be VERY careful of what u say and do around her. And stop being dependent on her for plans and make plans with other friends (lyk she seems to be doing to you)
thats mest up im mexican and omfg this is damm long but here it goes
sounds to me like you answer your own question u dont want to b with friends but when she comes back for something ur to nice not to say no then she treats u like crab..well my best answer is that you should just ignore ur friend dont listen to anything she has to say she WILL ill change ill promis but u can ask do people change some do but some dont and she sounds like the person that dont change just use you and though u away like u never did anything for them go ur own way get away from her hope i helped
no she not a good friend she not if she keep on doing that stuff she not wroth it leave her dont talk to her or anything you desever a better friend not somone who gonna keep on talking about you .. if she talks about you then she not your friend and move on and find a better friend
Stop being an enabler. You are enabling her to run to you with her problem, treat you the way that she treats you, and everything else that is going on. She is not your friend because if she was she would seriously act like one. I understand that she has problems and she need someone to be there for her but it can't be you because she is hurting you. Set her free. That way you will have that drama up out of your life. Let her go but keep it real with her.
she's not your real friend! And i know its hard, im going through something similar!! I know you just want to hold on to her, but your gunna have to let go! Find a new best friend...I wouldnt be able to stand her! But trust me! you will be WAY happier if you and her are just ''friends'' and not ''bffs'' But try talking to her first!
I say don't burn your bridges. Just be nice to her and be there for her if she needs someone to talk to. I wouldn't be bending over backwards for her, though, because she doesn't sound like she's treating you right. Start doing other things and hanging out with other people. You'll find real friends who make you feel good instead of bad.
People will define you by the people that you associate with. She hurts you more than she helps you. Try to find new friends.
FYI: Not all hispanics are mexicans.
no!she is not worth it. i got thru 5 of them and immediatly knew that this wasn't going to work.you 2 don't get along and probably won't-ever. don't hold on to something that isn't going to work. she doesn't respect you, or treat you like a real friend. you need to have a long talk and if she reacts wrongly, end it. don't hang on to something thats not going to change!
she dosent seem to be worth it. she treats you mean. however if you stillw ant to be her friend you can just dont be best friends, you can still hang out with her and stuff though. or maybe you can talk to her.
sorry if that was no help
She sounds like bad news. Take this upcoming school year to make new friends. You don't have to drop her right away. As you're making new friends and you know for sure you're not just acquaintances with them, you can slowly stop being her friend.
Can you or someone else help me with my problem?
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?鈥?/a>
I'd find a new best friend. Real best friends have your back no matter what, they're there for you through thick and thin, and wouldn't dare talk a bad word about you let alone behind your back.
No shes not worth ur time if she treats u this way. I think u shuld tell her all these things that she does and then say that u dont want to be friends no more. U obviously have other friends go hang with them some more. And its ur happiness that matters so do wut u feel is the right thing. Good Luck!
OK... I have a best friend. Lets call her... Mia. Mia and have been on and off BF's for almost a year and a half I think. And here are some problems I have with her:
-We would make plans them instead of me in them she would take a diff friend. After we talked it through and how fun it was going to be.
-When she gets mad at me she can never handle things herself. She has her ';real'; friends with as she would say and then act all tough.
- Her and I both talk about how we don't like the ';mexicans'; standing around like lows and home depot and by the gas stations because they are like whistling and junk. She has the nerve to say that '; i am a hypocrite because I said I HATE MEXICANS and I thought spanish was stupid'; she said that after I told her I was learning spanish. I've never said I hated mexicans no one in the right mind we be so dumb to say that about any race. Yeah.
-Her mom is like rough with her and like kinda does drugs and just got put into a mental home after mia found her o n their staircase playing with some lint... not kidding.
-Always questions our friendship like that maybe we shouldn't be friends. I heard if your real bff's no need to question it.
-People called her a racist at my school. like HEKKKKKAAAAA people like one of my other friends and ya. I don't really like racists.
-She talks about me like puts it out there and tells me that she talks about me behind my back. Ok then?
-If we were both sneaking around doing something bad she would blaim it on me. MULTIPLE times that has happened. then i would call her and ask her why she did that and the cat would catch her tongue. she'd be speechless.
-If i get mad at her -which i do for good reasons- she would ignore it and say this'; well... shouldn't i be mad at you too? you do things to make me mad.'; and im over here like ?????????????????? we ain't talking bout that we talking bout this!!!!!!!!!!so if i get mad at her she gotta be mad at me. that just dont make no sense!
-She has stolen from me, like my binder that I put my art in. and some pics of my family, and collected bookmarks. she would steal it. yeah. and more.
-i cant trust her with any secret what so ever she would just blabber it all out.
-i always give her stuff and am their for her when her mom acts up and shes sad and she starts cryin over some boy she barely know. then she say she got big plans fr us then something always pops up.
-she talks about her frinds behind their backs to me and then she would tell em that i was talking too. when i know dang well to keep my mouth shut!
-she doesnt make good descisions. i mean she dont smoke drink drugs she just yeah. not good descisions.
she would be the hippoctie cuz she says she hater perfume she wears that shnyt. she say she dont like mac n cheese that has powder she eats it anyway at school. she say she aint racist thats not what im hearin. she said she hates when people dont say by on the phone. she did that to me 20 mins ago she mad at me right now? and she started it by saying im a hippacrit. which is no the truth
-she makes up excuses to get off the phone with me saying sumtin lyk ';my mom is yellin at me im grounded for not takin out the trash.'; when i know she told me she say that to her other frinds.
-we make plans to go shoppin she wants to go wit her other frind then shye asks me when i tell her im going shoppin if she can come.
-we gonna do the talent show together, she wanna go do it wit some other chikk!
-MORE!!!!!!!!!!
-im not trying to make her look bad but she does do these things.
the new school year is starting and i want to know i should still be best friends with her. i dont really want to be just friends now that i think about it. she always comes running back to me when something. is wrong. i dont like one of her frineds and i start hangin wit em she be gettin HEKKKKA mad at me...
tell me what i shou;ld do please. i need yalls opinion thank you!!Should I stay friends with her? Read DESC.?
i would just stop hanging out with her..when school starts just stop talking to her, stop phone calls and ect..just move on she sounds like she has allot of problems..not saying your perfect but, friends are supposed to make you feel good not bad..sometimes you get stuck in a rutt and forget that but, its true ..Should I stay friends with her? Read DESC.?
no way. maybe you could be ';aqquaintances.'; but if she is going to treat you like that, DUMP HER
i Stopped Reading At You Hate Mexicans Standing At Lowes And Home Depot; Not All Mexicans Whistle Just The Pervert Ones And That's Really RACIST What You And Your Friend Says About TheM; REALLY A lot Of Trashy White GuysWhistlee And Are Pervs And Jack Off To Girls WalkingIn Frontt Of Them. So Don't Hate On Mexicans Ohkay And There At Lowes AndHome Depot Because They Fix There Shyt And Aren't Lazy And Hire Other People To Do There Yard Work/Work; You Are a HATER %26amp; a Racist Ha Wow And You Have Friends? Thats Suprising
You shouldn't hav to be worried to tell ur best friends secrets or hav to deal with her talking crap behind ur back. I hav a friend that sounds like ur best friend and we only hang out lyk strangers..we definitely aren't friends. So...no you shouldn't stay friends with her. U can talk to her but be VERY careful of what u say and do around her. And stop being dependent on her for plans and make plans with other friends (lyk she seems to be doing to you)
thats mest up im mexican and omfg this is damm long but here it goes
sounds to me like you answer your own question u dont want to b with friends but when she comes back for something ur to nice not to say no then she treats u like crab..well my best answer is that you should just ignore ur friend dont listen to anything she has to say she WILL ill change ill promis but u can ask do people change some do but some dont and she sounds like the person that dont change just use you and though u away like u never did anything for them go ur own way get away from her hope i helped
no she not a good friend she not if she keep on doing that stuff she not wroth it leave her dont talk to her or anything you desever a better friend not somone who gonna keep on talking about you .. if she talks about you then she not your friend and move on and find a better friend
Stop being an enabler. You are enabling her to run to you with her problem, treat you the way that she treats you, and everything else that is going on. She is not your friend because if she was she would seriously act like one. I understand that she has problems and she need someone to be there for her but it can't be you because she is hurting you. Set her free. That way you will have that drama up out of your life. Let her go but keep it real with her.
she's not your real friend! And i know its hard, im going through something similar!! I know you just want to hold on to her, but your gunna have to let go! Find a new best friend...I wouldnt be able to stand her! But trust me! you will be WAY happier if you and her are just ''friends'' and not ''bffs'' But try talking to her first!
I say don't burn your bridges. Just be nice to her and be there for her if she needs someone to talk to. I wouldn't be bending over backwards for her, though, because she doesn't sound like she's treating you right. Start doing other things and hanging out with other people. You'll find real friends who make you feel good instead of bad.
People will define you by the people that you associate with. She hurts you more than she helps you. Try to find new friends.
FYI: Not all hispanics are mexicans.
no!she is not worth it. i got thru 5 of them and immediatly knew that this wasn't going to work.you 2 don't get along and probably won't-ever. don't hold on to something that isn't going to work. she doesn't respect you, or treat you like a real friend. you need to have a long talk and if she reacts wrongly, end it. don't hang on to something thats not going to change!
she dosent seem to be worth it. she treats you mean. however if you stillw ant to be her friend you can just dont be best friends, you can still hang out with her and stuff though. or maybe you can talk to her.
sorry if that was no help
She sounds like bad news. Take this upcoming school year to make new friends. You don't have to drop her right away. As you're making new friends and you know for sure you're not just acquaintances with them, you can slowly stop being her friend.
Can you or someone else help me with my problem?
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?鈥?/a>
I'd find a new best friend. Real best friends have your back no matter what, they're there for you through thick and thin, and wouldn't dare talk a bad word about you let alone behind your back.
No shes not worth ur time if she treats u this way. I think u shuld tell her all these things that she does and then say that u dont want to be friends no more. U obviously have other friends go hang with them some more. And its ur happiness that matters so do wut u feel is the right thing. Good Luck!
My first rap. what u folks think?
rhymewise i do the figure eight so concisely
lyrically i am the erb so sit back and light me.
storming thru ur raps with th musical lightning
frightning, the only way to describe my words
breaking you down cause i'm loud and absurd.
yea heard? werd. cuz u gotsa learn
hows it gonna feel when u get a real burn.
white boy cam gonna teach you some terms,
go ahead and sell em, afford your next perm.
pretty boy rappin is the way of the game,
flow went down the river no its all about the fame.
fuckbitches get money aint why i came.
nowadays rappers try so hard to be the same
tame motherfuckers on the road thats been paved.
trailblazin died along with biggie and pac
now pppl want the quickest way to the top,
ever notice when they get there they just drop?
like flies to the ceiling fan crushed and forgot.
bringn it back the simplified track
catchy as **** man my words is like tack.
specialized weapons and tactics to back
my facts up, my chips are stacked up
high roller when it comes to the truth
outplayin most while im still in my youth.
loose tongue suckas i be readin their tells
say they sellin music when they just sellin bells
and whistles nd muthafuckin .22 pistols.
i see thru ur act like some polished crystal.
lookin at the state of western music today,
people of the nation should be feelin betrayed.
electronic voices makin millions of bucks
sellin out venues nobody gives a ****.
about talented rappers who be spittin they rhymes
generation X don't even give em the time.
chemical junkies never had no pride.
slide a pill down they throat and go for a ride.
think you got skills? you should go get a job.
cause if you think u gettin signed then u just gettin robbed
get a clue get a clue
rap is dead within you
but i choose to stay true
to myself not the crew.
but if you conclude that
there's something wrong, too
then maybe we can move on
Someone plz tell me how to post the audio i recorded w/out getting a myspace account.
also tell me what u think of the lyrics.My first rap. what u folks think?
lyrics not bad but also not the best i seen some like lil kid rhymes but not a lot it made cents it didnt go off topic so good job i couldn't see how the flow would go but if you find out how to record it let me know but 7/10What are the pros and cons of hosting the Olympics in a city new hair styles
lyrically i am the erb so sit back and light me.
storming thru ur raps with th musical lightning
frightning, the only way to describe my words
breaking you down cause i'm loud and absurd.
yea heard? werd. cuz u gotsa learn
hows it gonna feel when u get a real burn.
white boy cam gonna teach you some terms,
go ahead and sell em, afford your next perm.
pretty boy rappin is the way of the game,
flow went down the river no its all about the fame.
fuckbitches get money aint why i came.
nowadays rappers try so hard to be the same
tame motherfuckers on the road thats been paved.
trailblazin died along with biggie and pac
now pppl want the quickest way to the top,
ever notice when they get there they just drop?
like flies to the ceiling fan crushed and forgot.
bringn it back the simplified track
catchy as **** man my words is like tack.
specialized weapons and tactics to back
my facts up, my chips are stacked up
high roller when it comes to the truth
outplayin most while im still in my youth.
loose tongue suckas i be readin their tells
say they sellin music when they just sellin bells
and whistles nd muthafuckin .22 pistols.
i see thru ur act like some polished crystal.
lookin at the state of western music today,
people of the nation should be feelin betrayed.
electronic voices makin millions of bucks
sellin out venues nobody gives a ****.
about talented rappers who be spittin they rhymes
generation X don't even give em the time.
chemical junkies never had no pride.
slide a pill down they throat and go for a ride.
think you got skills? you should go get a job.
cause if you think u gettin signed then u just gettin robbed
get a clue get a clue
rap is dead within you
but i choose to stay true
to myself not the crew.
but if you conclude that
there's something wrong, too
then maybe we can move on
Someone plz tell me how to post the audio i recorded w/out getting a myspace account.
also tell me what u think of the lyrics.My first rap. what u folks think?
lyrics not bad but also not the best i seen some like lil kid rhymes but not a lot it made cents it didnt go off topic so good job i couldn't see how the flow would go but if you find out how to record it let me know but 7/10
Opening scene from my book. Opinions please? :)?
The wind whistled around my ears as I stepped out of the dark alleyway and into the moonlit street.
As I stood staring at the full moon I was suddenly aware of a presence behind me. I quickly turned around and scanned my surroundings carefully, focusing in on any particularly shadowy areas.
I stopped in my tracks and whipped my head back round to the left at record speed. Two deep topaz eyes stared out at me from the darkness and I breathed a sigh of relief as I recognised them instantly.
“Ah, Queen Desdemona, what a pleasant surprise” I whispered “How can I serve you Your Majesty?”
The Queen stepped out of the shadows to reveal herself. As she smiled at me warmly, the pointed fangs in her mouth glinted in the moonlight.
“I have come to assign you a mission, my dear Dante” she hissed “It’s the slayers; they’re beginning to cause me much more trouble than I care to deal with and they must be stopped. My people are becoming extinct at rapid rates because of them and something needs to be done; we can’t let them get away with this, Dante”
“Of course not Your Majesty” I bowed my head in gratitude “I will do whatever is necessary”
“In order to defeat the slayers we need to grow strong again, Dante. You will recruit new members to the Brotherhood; strong, powerful, useful ones; it’s the only way we will stand a chance.”
“But how....” I started.
“I don’t care how” she snapped “Just do it Dante!” I could feel her putrid breath on my neck as she began to trace her serpent like tongue across my skin.
She knew that I could not resist her; no vampire could resist their creator.
“I will succeed in your mission Queen Desdemona. I will make you proud”
“I’m counting on you, Dante. I have every faith in you” She whipped her tongue away from my neck and took a step back.
“Until the next time”
“Goodbye, Queen Desdemona”
I raised my head and watched as she flung her arms into the air;
Smouldering wisps of purple smoke draped down from under them to form a pair of magnificent wings.
Without another word, she ran towards the end of the street and glided into the air.
I stood in place and watched as the tiny dot that was Desdemona disappeared from view, before turning on my heel and disappearing into the shadows.
I know that changes need to be made but i'm at that stage where i don't know what needs to be changed for the better and what needs to be left as it is!
Any opinons would be appreciated :)
Thank You :)Opening scene from my book. Opinions please? :)?
Honestly, it is a good scene(you can call me an avid reader). Think about this : because it is your story i guess only you would be able to make a good guess of what the opening scene should be(as you know the content and the actual story)....what you can do is write down 2-3 opening scenes and then ask your friends or family to decide which should be a good one.........not only the opening but even the climax or crucial scenes of the novel should have 2-3 scripts, then decide the best among them.
the following link would help.......Opening scene from my book. Opinions please? :)?
Oh dear.....more vampires :(
Look, it's not for me. I'm done with vampires. Why do you put them in? Use, I don't know, pixies for example. Kidding on, but really, to make it more original, how about using something else. The grammar, is average. The suspense, is edging towards below average. But it's well written.
I love this, but it was very amateur, like many to start off with the wind whistling (Or having the weather involved at all). I think you are one of the very few people here who actually used some form of good grammar.
I think you should make the dialogue be more natural.
“Until the next time”
“Goodbye, Queen Desdemona”
Instead make it seem like they are actually engaging in a real conversation. I.e. I need to leave now Queen D.....
';Of course.';
Other than that you should be wary of what words you use, and be sure to think of keep it real.
As I stood staring at the full moon I was suddenly aware of a presence behind me. I quickly turned around and scanned my surroundings carefully, focusing in on any particularly shadowy areas.
I stopped in my tracks and whipped my head back round to the left at record speed. Two deep topaz eyes stared out at me from the darkness and I breathed a sigh of relief as I recognised them instantly.
“Ah, Queen Desdemona, what a pleasant surprise” I whispered “How can I serve you Your Majesty?”
The Queen stepped out of the shadows to reveal herself. As she smiled at me warmly, the pointed fangs in her mouth glinted in the moonlight.
“I have come to assign you a mission, my dear Dante” she hissed “It’s the slayers; they’re beginning to cause me much more trouble than I care to deal with and they must be stopped. My people are becoming extinct at rapid rates because of them and something needs to be done; we can’t let them get away with this, Dante”
“Of course not Your Majesty” I bowed my head in gratitude “I will do whatever is necessary”
“In order to defeat the slayers we need to grow strong again, Dante. You will recruit new members to the Brotherhood; strong, powerful, useful ones; it’s the only way we will stand a chance.”
“But how....” I started.
“I don’t care how” she snapped “Just do it Dante!” I could feel her putrid breath on my neck as she began to trace her serpent like tongue across my skin.
She knew that I could not resist her; no vampire could resist their creator.
“I will succeed in your mission Queen Desdemona. I will make you proud”
“I’m counting on you, Dante. I have every faith in you” She whipped her tongue away from my neck and took a step back.
“Until the next time”
“Goodbye, Queen Desdemona”
I raised my head and watched as she flung her arms into the air;
Smouldering wisps of purple smoke draped down from under them to form a pair of magnificent wings.
Without another word, she ran towards the end of the street and glided into the air.
I stood in place and watched as the tiny dot that was Desdemona disappeared from view, before turning on my heel and disappearing into the shadows.
I know that changes need to be made but i'm at that stage where i don't know what needs to be changed for the better and what needs to be left as it is!
Any opinons would be appreciated :)
Thank You :)Opening scene from my book. Opinions please? :)?
Honestly, it is a good scene(you can call me an avid reader). Think about this : because it is your story i guess only you would be able to make a good guess of what the opening scene should be(as you know the content and the actual story)....what you can do is write down 2-3 opening scenes and then ask your friends or family to decide which should be a good one.........not only the opening but even the climax or crucial scenes of the novel should have 2-3 scripts, then decide the best among them.
the following link would help.......Opening scene from my book. Opinions please? :)?
Oh dear.....more vampires :(
Look, it's not for me. I'm done with vampires. Why do you put them in? Use, I don't know, pixies for example. Kidding on, but really, to make it more original, how about using something else. The grammar, is average. The suspense, is edging towards below average. But it's well written.
I love this, but it was very amateur, like many to start off with the wind whistling (Or having the weather involved at all). I think you are one of the very few people here who actually used some form of good grammar.
I think you should make the dialogue be more natural.
“Until the next time”
“Goodbye, Queen Desdemona”
Instead make it seem like they are actually engaging in a real conversation. I.e. I need to leave now Queen D.....
';Of course.';
Other than that you should be wary of what words you use, and be sure to think of keep it real.
Which one should I enter in the writing competition (don't worry they're both short)?
Writing number one:
I crept, silently, holding my breath, as I tiptoed against the wall. I analyzed my prey, sound asleep, whistles escalating out of his mouth. I lifted up into the air, my flitting transparent wings making a soft, comforting buzz. I looked behind at the two on either side of me, and saw an eager glint in their eyes. I felt an anxious surge of protectiveness and growled,
“This one is mine.” Neither of them doubted my authority, and I saw the glint fade from their eyes. Their racing wings slowed and they dropped gracefully to the ground, and stood there obediently. I landed down on the resting place of my prey. His thick golden hair framed his round, chubby face. This was a baby; I could almost taste the smooth, fresh, taste. I flew in closer. Ten toes and ten fingers fidgeted. I flew in even closer. This one was not even of two years; my mouth watered. The fan in the room blew me slightly off course, and I lowered my path, close to the bottom of the cot. I weaved in and out of the rails, seeing how long I could last before my mouth’s desire would drag me towards him. This would be a game. I flew through the rail at the end and landed on the cotton blanket. The baby’s blonde hair blew ever so slightly in the cool breeze of the overhead fan. I pushed up with my legs and flew forward onto the warm, but still dry, cheek. The baby giggled at the tickle on his cheek and a blast of air blew me off his cheek as his hand raced up to smack down on me, still asleep, the quiet whistles continuing. As his hand flopped back down to rest beside his head, I tiptoed back to the center of his cheek. I heard a quiet, irritating buzz behind me. The other two were on top of the rails of the cot.
“Mine.” I repeated firmly.
“We are simply watching and learning,” one answered innocently.
“You’d better be,” I growled, but went back to concentrating on my prey. The breeze of the fan blew his smell into my lungs. I could nearly taste it… I slipped my fangs swiftly and quietly into his cheek, and tasted the smooth, rich taste, flowing onto my tongue. I didn’t want it to stop. I saw out of the corner of my eye a hand coming towards me, and ducked to the side.
“Shoo, fly!” a young voice yelled. I pushed off his cheek as he sprang up, smacking his cheek.
Fly. He had labeled me a disgusting, gritty creature who rolled around in animal feces. No, I lived a far more civilized life. My bloodline went back centuries; my family lived a highly sophisticated lifestyle. I am a mosquito.
Or writing number 2:
I gritted my teeth, unable to force my gaze over to that man. There was a wall, blocking a view of him. A foul smell came from him. Not the kind you sense through your nose. I felt his hand on my shoulder, and it felt like long claws digging themselves in to me, reaching into my soul, freezing it. Words came from his mouth, but they didn’t come as words; just his voice, it would send chills down your spine. His voice seemed full of …of rust, decay. His breath, it disgusted me – not the smell, the feeling of his breath. The way you wished it wasn’t there, wanted to wash it off, but it would stain, be there forever. It reminded me of his smirking grin, of the power that surrounded him. You could tell everything about him from that voice, that voice that would penetrate into everything good inside you. Coldness lurked in his shadow, and to look into his eyes, would require the most courage. Only a fearless soul could do this and remain sane. For by looking into his eyes, you could realize that this was no man. His white eyes, a beacon, a bright, white beacon, in each eye they told you this was a monster. He was a thief of your Eye Spirit. To look into his eyes, not to look at them, to look into them, to let him look into yours, is to lose your Eye Spirit: the life that lives in your eyes, the window to your soul. Once that is lost, you become Dull. You can not let your emotion out, it builds up inside you, become greater each minute; To have each scream of anger, each sob, choking you; To live the rest of your life, it building up, pushing, pushing, but no where for it to come out. Inside, you writhe in agony, but it is stuck.
The curtain is drawn over the window to your soul.Which one should I enter in the writing competition (don't worry they're both short)?
I understand the challenge in chossing! I personally would pick the first becase it makes more sense. I personally understood it because im a writer myself (and have reviewed a couple things like this for a friend) Wish you luck!!Which one should I enter in the writing competition (don't worry they're both short)?
liking the 1st one!
You are a good writer. I like the first one!!!
i liked the first. your writing style is cool.
I like the first one, the end is kinda unexpected. Except u repeat the stuff about the fan and all that too often. And the whistling sleep sounds kinda unreal, better keep it simple (in my opinion anyway).
I crept, silently, holding my breath, as I tiptoed against the wall. I analyzed my prey, sound asleep, whistles escalating out of his mouth. I lifted up into the air, my flitting transparent wings making a soft, comforting buzz. I looked behind at the two on either side of me, and saw an eager glint in their eyes. I felt an anxious surge of protectiveness and growled,
“This one is mine.” Neither of them doubted my authority, and I saw the glint fade from their eyes. Their racing wings slowed and they dropped gracefully to the ground, and stood there obediently. I landed down on the resting place of my prey. His thick golden hair framed his round, chubby face. This was a baby; I could almost taste the smooth, fresh, taste. I flew in closer. Ten toes and ten fingers fidgeted. I flew in even closer. This one was not even of two years; my mouth watered. The fan in the room blew me slightly off course, and I lowered my path, close to the bottom of the cot. I weaved in and out of the rails, seeing how long I could last before my mouth’s desire would drag me towards him. This would be a game. I flew through the rail at the end and landed on the cotton blanket. The baby’s blonde hair blew ever so slightly in the cool breeze of the overhead fan. I pushed up with my legs and flew forward onto the warm, but still dry, cheek. The baby giggled at the tickle on his cheek and a blast of air blew me off his cheek as his hand raced up to smack down on me, still asleep, the quiet whistles continuing. As his hand flopped back down to rest beside his head, I tiptoed back to the center of his cheek. I heard a quiet, irritating buzz behind me. The other two were on top of the rails of the cot.
“Mine.” I repeated firmly.
“We are simply watching and learning,” one answered innocently.
“You’d better be,” I growled, but went back to concentrating on my prey. The breeze of the fan blew his smell into my lungs. I could nearly taste it… I slipped my fangs swiftly and quietly into his cheek, and tasted the smooth, rich taste, flowing onto my tongue. I didn’t want it to stop. I saw out of the corner of my eye a hand coming towards me, and ducked to the side.
“Shoo, fly!” a young voice yelled. I pushed off his cheek as he sprang up, smacking his cheek.
Fly. He had labeled me a disgusting, gritty creature who rolled around in animal feces. No, I lived a far more civilized life. My bloodline went back centuries; my family lived a highly sophisticated lifestyle. I am a mosquito.
Or writing number 2:
I gritted my teeth, unable to force my gaze over to that man. There was a wall, blocking a view of him. A foul smell came from him. Not the kind you sense through your nose. I felt his hand on my shoulder, and it felt like long claws digging themselves in to me, reaching into my soul, freezing it. Words came from his mouth, but they didn’t come as words; just his voice, it would send chills down your spine. His voice seemed full of …of rust, decay. His breath, it disgusted me – not the smell, the feeling of his breath. The way you wished it wasn’t there, wanted to wash it off, but it would stain, be there forever. It reminded me of his smirking grin, of the power that surrounded him. You could tell everything about him from that voice, that voice that would penetrate into everything good inside you. Coldness lurked in his shadow, and to look into his eyes, would require the most courage. Only a fearless soul could do this and remain sane. For by looking into his eyes, you could realize that this was no man. His white eyes, a beacon, a bright, white beacon, in each eye they told you this was a monster. He was a thief of your Eye Spirit. To look into his eyes, not to look at them, to look into them, to let him look into yours, is to lose your Eye Spirit: the life that lives in your eyes, the window to your soul. Once that is lost, you become Dull. You can not let your emotion out, it builds up inside you, become greater each minute; To have each scream of anger, each sob, choking you; To live the rest of your life, it building up, pushing, pushing, but no where for it to come out. Inside, you writhe in agony, but it is stuck.
The curtain is drawn over the window to your soul.Which one should I enter in the writing competition (don't worry they're both short)?
I understand the challenge in chossing! I personally would pick the first becase it makes more sense. I personally understood it because im a writer myself (and have reviewed a couple things like this for a friend) Wish you luck!!Which one should I enter in the writing competition (don't worry they're both short)?
liking the 1st one!
You are a good writer. I like the first one!!!
i liked the first. your writing style is cool.
I like the first one, the end is kinda unexpected. Except u repeat the stuff about the fan and all that too often. And the whistling sleep sounds kinda unreal, better keep it simple (in my opinion anyway).
This girl always tries to impress me and it's extremely annoying to me?
She's one of my ';friends';. I've kind of been biting my tongue and just putting up with her because I don't want to be mean. Now, understand that I'm a guy and she's a girl, so I don't know if the case is that she likes me or something? Who knows...
She's a grade below me and I've been her best friend for about a year or so... but she ALWAYS tells me things that I'm pretty sure she only tells me so I'll be impressed or something.
She makes up stories (I'm pretty sure she makes them up anyway) about how random guys stare at her, or follow her around, or whistle at her, whatever... and today's story was that a guy came up to her and kissed her for no reason. I think she tells me things like that because she wants me to think that lots of guys like her and think she's cool, and somehow thinks that by telling me, it will make me think the same. Which, to be honest, just isn't true.
And sometimes she makes something up, pretending that she's completely oblivious to what she obviously is wanting me to think. For example, she told me once, ';So I was hugging one of my guy friends, and over his shoulder I saw my other guy friend stop and glare at me kind of, and turn around and walk the other way, and then he wouldn't talk to me the rest of the day. Do you know why he could have done that?';
yeah right, you obviously just made that entire story up at a failed attempt to either impress me or make me jealous. Right? You know the answer to your own question about that entirely fake little story you made up. It's irritating, immature, and naive. How can I make her stop this?This girl always tries to impress me and it's extremely annoying to me?
i had the same prolbem once...
the answer to your issue seems simple, bring it up to her face you honestly seem like the blunt type of person so just tell her streght forward...never the less you know that she will pertend to be obvlious to it,so tell her that this game has gone on far enough you dont have time to skrew around if your going to flirt then do so but leave me out of it, if she is ignorant to this then tell her your friendship is over (weather it is or not) jsut leave her alone ...she need time for the thought of understanding to set in.
She's a grade below me and I've been her best friend for about a year or so... but she ALWAYS tells me things that I'm pretty sure she only tells me so I'll be impressed or something.
She makes up stories (I'm pretty sure she makes them up anyway) about how random guys stare at her, or follow her around, or whistle at her, whatever... and today's story was that a guy came up to her and kissed her for no reason. I think she tells me things like that because she wants me to think that lots of guys like her and think she's cool, and somehow thinks that by telling me, it will make me think the same. Which, to be honest, just isn't true.
And sometimes she makes something up, pretending that she's completely oblivious to what she obviously is wanting me to think. For example, she told me once, ';So I was hugging one of my guy friends, and over his shoulder I saw my other guy friend stop and glare at me kind of, and turn around and walk the other way, and then he wouldn't talk to me the rest of the day. Do you know why he could have done that?';
yeah right, you obviously just made that entire story up at a failed attempt to either impress me or make me jealous. Right? You know the answer to your own question about that entirely fake little story you made up. It's irritating, immature, and naive. How can I make her stop this?This girl always tries to impress me and it's extremely annoying to me?
i had the same prolbem once...
the answer to your issue seems simple, bring it up to her face you honestly seem like the blunt type of person so just tell her streght forward...never the less you know that she will pertend to be obvlious to it,so tell her that this game has gone on far enough you dont have time to skrew around if your going to flirt then do so but leave me out of it, if she is ignorant to this then tell her your friendship is over (weather it is or not) jsut leave her alone ...she need time for the thought of understanding to set in.
Do you like a snippet of my book. IT's a harry potter book about lily and severus. ?
Hi. I did post a paragraph about a book i was making and that's really well so thanks for all the advice. It's going great and recently I have been copying better with the death of my cousin and I have someone who comes in and helps me so thanks again. I'm powering through.
I'm starting a book called Always. It's set in the time of the marauders and it's about Lily and Severus, my two favourite characters in the harry potter series.
I hope you like it so far, sorry about the spelling mistakes and it would be great to hear your thoughts, idea and any advice.
Always
Severus tried to take Lily to classes, Lily liked his companying, Severus loved her company. Of course, students stared at them, hissing at our strange mix, green and red… were frowned upon by students. Yellow and blue and red were fine…
Severus always had dreams… James Potter, the perfect Gryffindor and his gang. I’ve had enough of their crap, he would say out loud in his sleep. I need Lily, her emerald eyes penetrate my eyes, starrying my dreams, The climate of my oblivion, the unconciousness if electrifying.
After their first broomstick practise, Lily groaned. “I’m hopeless.” Groaned Lily. As the whistle blew. She turned to Severus for comfort, but he was too busy being airborne bullied on his broomstick. Sirius Black, tall and wiry, it was remarkable how young he was too have thick bands of muscle around his arms and torso, a host of minor scars and long black hair and blue eyes; was enclosing upon Sverus on his broom, spitting out profanities of all sorts, spells and Latin language that only the posh Blacks would have learnt. A glimpse of his good looks could be sene through his grin as he Severus fell to the ground. Tears were meandering Severus’s face.
Lily sighed and ran over to Severus.
“Stop there Lily. Snivel- “ the flying coach blushed and bit his tongue.
“See, even the teacher’s think he’s pathetic, Alright there Sev!” James laughed. Peter, short and purple-faced, snorted. Lupin shook his head.
“Everyone inside, Lily, take Mr Snape.” He frowned. “to the sickbay. Black, over he please!” he barked.
James smirked and disappeared with the rest of the class back up to the class. “Come on, Severus.” Said Lily. Severus stopped crying and straightened his back. Severus walked behind her, blood dripping from the depp cuts traced across his body. James jogged over to Lily, ignoring Severus from behind who suddenly stopped wimpering, and gave a dark look of loathing towards him. t. “You and Snivelus, huh?” he posed, his tone rebellious. He looked round at Severus who was looking at his feet as he walked but it was obvious he was listening with resentment, and was shaking uncontrollably.
“His names Severus… leave him alone, leave us alone! That’s none of your business, James.” Lily warned, casting a fiery look at him, his untidy sable hair, his wide mischievous chocolate eyes irritating Lily, yet somewhere in her heart they dazzled her. She tried to stop herself, she felt as she was betraying Severus, her best friend. The boy who was crying like a bay, watching her feat as she walked. “I’ve told you before , I want to vomit when I look at you.” James expression looked weary, like he didn’t want to hear Lily’s words. Severus was thankful for Lily sticking up for him, yet he wished she could of said nothing, like she was pitying him and everyone knew he was useless.
“I don’t like it.” James muttered, acting as though Severus wasn’t there.
“You don’t have too. I don’t need your stupid permission, I don’t know you and I don’t want to know you. “
“Don’y you feel embarrassed when your with him.”
“Shut your face. Lily turned slowly round, smiling. James whipped round, sneering.
James lingered on his breath, knowing he was going to say something awful, swallowed, kissed Lily on the cheek lightly and walked away, hands in his pockets. Snape growled under his breath.
Dedicated to my cousin, Juliet who passed away two weeks ago.
Do you like a snippet of my book. IT's a harry potter book about lily and severus. ?
ever heard of copyright infringement? i'd look into it if i were you... it's a felonyDo you like a snippet of my book. IT's a harry potter book about lily and severus. ?
there are a lot of words waiting to be corrected, its sweet though and has a good use of language.
and its plagarism-copyright, so you cant sell it.
lol. it's quite good, but you have got a few grammatical errors in there!
I LOVE SNAPE TOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!! %26lt;3
IT IS REALLY GOOD!!! :)
Ignore the people's comments being mean to you about copyright laws. They are right, technically you can not sell this as a book, or make any money off it, or claim it as your own, because that is illegal.
BUT. There is a site called www.fanfiction.net that is basically a collection of stories like you have written, about characters from a book/movie/tv show, that have been written by fans and budding writers. You can not legally earn money or claim the characters as your own, but as long as you put a disclaimer (a note saying that the original characters and harry potter books are not yours and that you are not earning money) then you can put your story on this site, and let people read it. I know, not as satisfying as publishing it, but unless you write something completely original, this is the best you can do. I write stuff all the time and put it on this site, so check it out, because its awesome.(Please do not try to publish this story illegally, i'd hate to see you in jail just for wanting to write!)
As for the writing itself, its pretty good, and you have a good storyline. Keep writing, keep dreaming, and hopefully you can publish something of your own some day. :)
Jaz
I'm starting a book called Always. It's set in the time of the marauders and it's about Lily and Severus, my two favourite characters in the harry potter series.
I hope you like it so far, sorry about the spelling mistakes and it would be great to hear your thoughts, idea and any advice.
Always
Severus tried to take Lily to classes, Lily liked his companying, Severus loved her company. Of course, students stared at them, hissing at our strange mix, green and red… were frowned upon by students. Yellow and blue and red were fine…
Severus always had dreams… James Potter, the perfect Gryffindor and his gang. I’ve had enough of their crap, he would say out loud in his sleep. I need Lily, her emerald eyes penetrate my eyes, starrying my dreams, The climate of my oblivion, the unconciousness if electrifying.
After their first broomstick practise, Lily groaned. “I’m hopeless.” Groaned Lily. As the whistle blew. She turned to Severus for comfort, but he was too busy being airborne bullied on his broomstick. Sirius Black, tall and wiry, it was remarkable how young he was too have thick bands of muscle around his arms and torso, a host of minor scars and long black hair and blue eyes; was enclosing upon Sverus on his broom, spitting out profanities of all sorts, spells and Latin language that only the posh Blacks would have learnt. A glimpse of his good looks could be sene through his grin as he Severus fell to the ground. Tears were meandering Severus’s face.
Lily sighed and ran over to Severus.
“Stop there Lily. Snivel- “ the flying coach blushed and bit his tongue.
“See, even the teacher’s think he’s pathetic, Alright there Sev!” James laughed. Peter, short and purple-faced, snorted. Lupin shook his head.
“Everyone inside, Lily, take Mr Snape.” He frowned. “to the sickbay. Black, over he please!” he barked.
James smirked and disappeared with the rest of the class back up to the class. “Come on, Severus.” Said Lily. Severus stopped crying and straightened his back. Severus walked behind her, blood dripping from the depp cuts traced across his body. James jogged over to Lily, ignoring Severus from behind who suddenly stopped wimpering, and gave a dark look of loathing towards him. t. “You and Snivelus, huh?” he posed, his tone rebellious. He looked round at Severus who was looking at his feet as he walked but it was obvious he was listening with resentment, and was shaking uncontrollably.
“His names Severus… leave him alone, leave us alone! That’s none of your business, James.” Lily warned, casting a fiery look at him, his untidy sable hair, his wide mischievous chocolate eyes irritating Lily, yet somewhere in her heart they dazzled her. She tried to stop herself, she felt as she was betraying Severus, her best friend. The boy who was crying like a bay, watching her feat as she walked. “I’ve told you before , I want to vomit when I look at you.” James expression looked weary, like he didn’t want to hear Lily’s words. Severus was thankful for Lily sticking up for him, yet he wished she could of said nothing, like she was pitying him and everyone knew he was useless.
“I don’t like it.” James muttered, acting as though Severus wasn’t there.
“You don’t have too. I don’t need your stupid permission, I don’t know you and I don’t want to know you. “
“Don’y you feel embarrassed when your with him.”
“Shut your face. Lily turned slowly round, smiling. James whipped round, sneering.
James lingered on his breath, knowing he was going to say something awful, swallowed, kissed Lily on the cheek lightly and walked away, hands in his pockets. Snape growled under his breath.
Dedicated to my cousin, Juliet who passed away two weeks ago.
Do you like a snippet of my book. IT's a harry potter book about lily and severus. ?
ever heard of copyright infringement? i'd look into it if i were you... it's a felonyDo you like a snippet of my book. IT's a harry potter book about lily and severus. ?
there are a lot of words waiting to be corrected, its sweet though and has a good use of language.
and its plagarism-copyright, so you cant sell it.
lol. it's quite good, but you have got a few grammatical errors in there!
I LOVE SNAPE TOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!! %26lt;3
IT IS REALLY GOOD!!! :)
Ignore the people's comments being mean to you about copyright laws. They are right, technically you can not sell this as a book, or make any money off it, or claim it as your own, because that is illegal.
BUT. There is a site called www.fanfiction.net that is basically a collection of stories like you have written, about characters from a book/movie/tv show, that have been written by fans and budding writers. You can not legally earn money or claim the characters as your own, but as long as you put a disclaimer (a note saying that the original characters and harry potter books are not yours and that you are not earning money) then you can put your story on this site, and let people read it. I know, not as satisfying as publishing it, but unless you write something completely original, this is the best you can do. I write stuff all the time and put it on this site, so check it out, because its awesome.(Please do not try to publish this story illegally, i'd hate to see you in jail just for wanting to write!)
As for the writing itself, its pretty good, and you have a good storyline. Keep writing, keep dreaming, and hopefully you can publish something of your own some day. :)
Jaz
Annoying neighbor. How do I get rid of her?
Hi. I'm in quite an ordeal and was wondering if you all could help me out. I like to think I keep to myself most of the time. I live in a small place with neighbors to each side of me. My next door neighbor is quite an annoyance as she feels that she needs to tell me everything. I've been updated monthly on her pregnancy and each time I simply close the door on her while she is mid-sentence. You think she'd get a clue. Well anyways she finally finally had the kid, and it ended up being a boy. I must say I was actually happy that she did something right, or at least so I thought. She brought the kid over to show me and let me hold. I thought it was time to make this kid a man and put some hair on it's chest, so I gave it some hot sauce. I put less then half a drop on it's tongue and it didn't seem to like it, so I did what normal people would do. I places him in the trash. She seemed to go absolutly nuts and started screaming in my house. I don't like noise in my place so I threw her out. Thats when she started throwing stuff at my house. My mom woke up and noticed all this and I got into one little fight and my mom got scared and said ';you're moving with your auntie and uncle in belair.'; I whistled for a cab and when it came near the license plate said fresh and had a dice in the mirror. If anything I could say that this cab was rare but I thought man forget it yo home to Belair. I pulled up to a house about seven or eight andI I yelled to the cabbie ';yo holmes smells ya later.'; Looked at my kingdom I was finally there to sit on my throan as the prince of belair.Annoying neighbor. How do I get rid of her?
stupid as$.
you have nothing to do right now. go do somethingAnnoying neighbor. How do I get rid of her?
You DUMBASS!!!!! ROFLOL........Well, at least you are helping me stay awake. Its one in the morning and MY neighbor from hell is shooting off his fireworks that are ILLEGAL in this state....
thanks that took up about 2 minutes of my time...only 54 minutes left
YOU'RE A RETARD!
Thanks for the nice pre-4th of July laugh. Good one!
stupid as$.
you have nothing to do right now. go do somethingAnnoying neighbor. How do I get rid of her?
You DUMBASS!!!!! ROFLOL........Well, at least you are helping me stay awake. Its one in the morning and MY neighbor from hell is shooting off his fireworks that are ILLEGAL in this state....
thanks that took up about 2 minutes of my time...only 54 minutes left
YOU'RE A RETARD!
Thanks for the nice pre-4th of July laugh. Good one!
Question about separating notes on a instrument.?
Well the question and the topic is a little difficult to describe so i'll do my best.
Ok, I play the trombone, I have for about 10 years. I never really payed attention to how I separate my notes, everyone always told my ';tongue'; do this do that. Recently I was wondering about it, because I found that I don't really ';tongue'; .... I started to pay a lot more attention to it, and i realized I never use my tongue.
No one has ever said anything about my sound, or anything, people have told me I have a really good sound, and that I play fairly well. By no means am I really good or anything, but i've made jazz all state etc.
I tried looking it up but i can not find anything. The only good way i've found for describing what I do is this:
If anyone whistles; when you whistle how do you separate your notes? ... Yeah thats how I do it on the trombone, or any instrument i play.
It is kind of like I separate the note with my diaphragm or throat? basically by just stopping my air flow and restarting it.
This doesn't cause me any trouble, I am just merely curious as to what I am doing.
Now mind you, I can separate the notes just as fast if not faster then someone double tonguing, I can play staccato legato etc.
My main question here is, does anyone know exactly what I am doing? Is it a really bad habit? And do you know anyone else who does this?Question about separating notes on a instrument.?
You want to make a tuh-tuh type of sound with your tongue and make sure that your tongue hits the back of you front teeth.
Your present way of tonguing is not bad if it sounds alright but you will sound better if you use your tongue.Question about separating notes on a instrument.?
I used to play the recorder that way, before I learned about tonguing.
The term you are looking for is ';glottal attack.';
In the word ';uh-oh,'; the first syllable starts with a glottal attack and ends with a glottal stop.
The second syllable also begins with a glottal attack but doesn't end with a glottal stop.
Are you from the United States?
If you are, then you are familiar with thewords ';uh-huh,'; which means yes, and ';uh-uh,'; which means no.
Those words also have glottal attacks and glottal stops.
With a trombone you don't actually stop with your tongue but breathe in. quickly just enough to stop the air from going through the horn. i have to do the same thing because i play the flute. but u kind of have to train yourself to use ur tongue if you are do something like 8th notes. u just have to play with it until u feel comfortable with it.What are the pros and cons of hosting the Olympics in a city new hair styles
Ok, I play the trombone, I have for about 10 years. I never really payed attention to how I separate my notes, everyone always told my ';tongue'; do this do that. Recently I was wondering about it, because I found that I don't really ';tongue'; .... I started to pay a lot more attention to it, and i realized I never use my tongue.
No one has ever said anything about my sound, or anything, people have told me I have a really good sound, and that I play fairly well. By no means am I really good or anything, but i've made jazz all state etc.
I tried looking it up but i can not find anything. The only good way i've found for describing what I do is this:
If anyone whistles; when you whistle how do you separate your notes? ... Yeah thats how I do it on the trombone, or any instrument i play.
It is kind of like I separate the note with my diaphragm or throat? basically by just stopping my air flow and restarting it.
This doesn't cause me any trouble, I am just merely curious as to what I am doing.
Now mind you, I can separate the notes just as fast if not faster then someone double tonguing, I can play staccato legato etc.
My main question here is, does anyone know exactly what I am doing? Is it a really bad habit? And do you know anyone else who does this?Question about separating notes on a instrument.?
You want to make a tuh-tuh type of sound with your tongue and make sure that your tongue hits the back of you front teeth.
Your present way of tonguing is not bad if it sounds alright but you will sound better if you use your tongue.Question about separating notes on a instrument.?
I used to play the recorder that way, before I learned about tonguing.
The term you are looking for is ';glottal attack.';
In the word ';uh-oh,'; the first syllable starts with a glottal attack and ends with a glottal stop.
The second syllable also begins with a glottal attack but doesn't end with a glottal stop.
Are you from the United States?
If you are, then you are familiar with thewords ';uh-huh,'; which means yes, and ';uh-uh,'; which means no.
Those words also have glottal attacks and glottal stops.
With a trombone you don't actually stop with your tongue but breathe in. quickly just enough to stop the air from going through the horn. i have to do the same thing because i play the flute. but u kind of have to train yourself to use ur tongue if you are do something like 8th notes. u just have to play with it until u feel comfortable with it.
How can I tell if my cockitiel is a boy or girl?
Here is a discription of my bird i got it about 6 months ago. sometime in november or late october. i named her polly. but now im not sure. polly would also be cute for a boy too right? Polly sings all the time. she learns quick from me. she knows how to whistle from me and do this other pattern like tttttttt with ur tongue hitting the back of your teeth. Polly is gray and white on her feathers. And yellow on her head going to grey on her neck. with medium orange spots. i just checked and underneath her wings is all grey but on top is all grey on both sides with one large bar of white and like a spot attached??? a weird pattern. and its a think line with some white bar stuff going out???? i got her in 2007 late october or soemtime in november. plerase help and sorry i could not attach a photo. and give me more signs of what sex she is. thank youHow can I tell if my cockitiel is a boy or girl?
She actually sounds more like a male. The males are normally the ones who learn vocalizations, though there are exceptions. With the normal grey (and whiteface, but yours isn't that) mutation, which is mostly grey except for the yellow head with orange cheeks (the yellow is dull in the females) and those white bars on the wings, the males get the bright yellow heads and lose the barring on the underside of the tail. Basically, they look like this: http://www.majhost.com/gallery/shiney-me鈥?/a>
And if you ever play Apollo Justice: Ace Attorney, I think you'll find that Polly (Apollo's nickname) is a cute name for a male cockatiel.How can I tell if my cockitiel is a boy or girl?
You definently have a male cockatiel. Only male cockatiels will whistle tunes, and only male cockatiels will have all yellow or white faces without any grey unless the male is a dirty face pied who will have gray on the face but still whistle tunes. Female cockatiels will only tweet, and most females have grey faces.
You can go here to LEARN the gentics of cockatiels and what you may get if you breed your cockatiels too.
http://www.kirstenmunson.com/cockatiels/
Behaviorally Polly sounds like a male. Is Polly's head bright yellow or dull yellow? If bright yellow Polly is most likely a male if dull yellow most likely a female. Also look under the tail feathers Polly is old enough that if a female she will have structural barring on the tail feathers if a male he will not.
When it comes to birds, the only way to determine gender is to either put it in a cage with others and see if it gets pregnant or makes others pregnant, or take it in for a blood test that'll determine the gender.
The orange their face. Light color orange , it's a female, bright color orange its a male
i would say a male but to be absolutely sure get a blood test/sexed.
Ask it. They talk you know.
your bird isnt female its male. thats why it whistles alot. one question though so we can be 100% sure but look under the tail has it got baring? or is it just plain. if its barred then its female if not then it is male. males also have an all yellow face with the orange cheek patches as for the females you can see little bit of yellow on the face,
ladycockatiel. hen tiels can still whistle but they dont whistle as much as males do.
She actually sounds more like a male. The males are normally the ones who learn vocalizations, though there are exceptions. With the normal grey (and whiteface, but yours isn't that) mutation, which is mostly grey except for the yellow head with orange cheeks (the yellow is dull in the females) and those white bars on the wings, the males get the bright yellow heads and lose the barring on the underside of the tail. Basically, they look like this: http://www.majhost.com/gallery/shiney-me鈥?/a>
And if you ever play Apollo Justice: Ace Attorney, I think you'll find that Polly (Apollo's nickname) is a cute name for a male cockatiel.How can I tell if my cockitiel is a boy or girl?
You definently have a male cockatiel. Only male cockatiels will whistle tunes, and only male cockatiels will have all yellow or white faces without any grey unless the male is a dirty face pied who will have gray on the face but still whistle tunes. Female cockatiels will only tweet, and most females have grey faces.
You can go here to LEARN the gentics of cockatiels and what you may get if you breed your cockatiels too.
http://www.kirstenmunson.com/cockatiels/
Behaviorally Polly sounds like a male. Is Polly's head bright yellow or dull yellow? If bright yellow Polly is most likely a male if dull yellow most likely a female. Also look under the tail feathers Polly is old enough that if a female she will have structural barring on the tail feathers if a male he will not.
When it comes to birds, the only way to determine gender is to either put it in a cage with others and see if it gets pregnant or makes others pregnant, or take it in for a blood test that'll determine the gender.
The orange their face. Light color orange , it's a female, bright color orange its a male
i would say a male but to be absolutely sure get a blood test/sexed.
Ask it. They talk you know.
your bird isnt female its male. thats why it whistles alot. one question though so we can be 100% sure but look under the tail has it got baring? or is it just plain. if its barred then its female if not then it is male. males also have an all yellow face with the orange cheek patches as for the females you can see little bit of yellow on the face,
ladycockatiel. hen tiels can still whistle but they dont whistle as much as males do.
63 ways to make a cop mad..? ?
1.
When you get pulled over, say ';What's wrong, ossifer, there's no blood in my alcohol?';
2. When he asks why you were speeding, tell him you wanted to race.
3. When he talks to you, pretend you are deaf.
4. If he asks if you knew how fast you were going, say no, my speedometer only goes to......
5. Ask if you can see his gun.
6. When he says you aren't allowed, tell him I just wanted to see if mine was bigger.
7. Touch him.
8. When he asks why you were speeding, tell him you had to buy a hat.
9. Ask him where he bought his cool hat.
10. Refer to him by his first name.
11. Pretend you are gay and ask him out.
12. When he says no, cry.
13. If he says yes, accuse him of sexual harassment.
14. If the cop is a woman, tell her how ugly she is, but in a nice way.
15. If he asks you to step out of the car, automatically throw yourself on the hood.
16. When he asks you to spread them, tell him you don't go that way.
17.
When he puts the handcuffs on, say ';Usually my dates buy me dinner first';
18. Ask to be fingerprinted with candy, cause you don't like ink on your fingers.
19. After you sign the ticket and give it to him, say ';Oops! That's the wrong name.
';
20. Bribe him with donuts, and when he agrees, tell him sorry, I just ate the last one.
21. When he comes up to the car, say ';License and registration, please'; right when he says it.
22.
When he goes to read you your rights, sing ';La La La, I can't hear you!';
23. Trip and fall into him.
24. Accuse him of police brutality when he pushes you away.
25. Before you sign the ticket, pick your nose. You have to sign with his pen.
26. Chew on the pen, nervously.
27. Clean your ear with the pen.
28. If it's a click pen, take it apart and play with the spring.
29. Ask if he has a daughter. If he says yes, say I thought the name sounded familiar.....
30. Ask him if he ever worked in a prison. If he says yes, ask him how the plumbing was.
31. Act like you are retarded.
32. When he's telling you what you did wrong, start repeating him, quietly.
33. Mumble to yourself.
34.
When he tells you to stop, say what are you talkin about, DUDE?
35. Drive to Dunkin Donuts and say hmmm....only 5 of you here tonight.......
36. Ask if they know how to make the donuts.
37.
When he comes to the car, say I have a badge just like yours!
38. Ask if he watches Cops.
39. Ask if ever watched Cop Rock.
40. Giggle if he did.
41. Talk to your hand.
42. Ask if he knows somone named Rosy Palm and her Five Favorite Friends.
43. Accuse him of Sexual Harassment if he does.
44. When he frisks you, say You missed a spot, and grin.
45. When he asks to inspect your car, say there is no alcohol in my car, sir, the last cop got it.
46. Try to sell him your car.
47. Ask if you can buy his car.
48. If he takes you to the station, Ask to sit in front.
49. Play with the siren.
50. If you know him, say you had his wife for dinner.
51. If you don't know him, ask if you can have his wife for dinner. Oops...I meant OVER for dinner
52. Ask if he ever had pu-tang er.
53. If he asks what it is, point at him and giggle.
54. If there is someone else in the car, talk to each other in tongues.
55. When he acts confused, keep talking, look at him and laugh.
56. When you are in the back, touch his neck through the fencing.
57. Turn your head and whistle.
58. When he pulls out his night stick, say what you gonna do with that.
59. If you are female, say I don't do that on the first date.
60. If he sticks you in the back of the car, cower in the corner, suck your thumb, and whine.
61.
Stare at his lights and say ';Look at the pretty colors!';
62. Tell him you like men in uniform.
63.
Ask if you can borrow his uniform for a Halloween party63 ways to make a cop mad..? ?
HAHAHAHA this is HILARIOUS :)63 ways to make a cop mad..? ?
i love the pen one. My best friend does that. I love 58 and I love 61. How'd you paste this long list? i thought there was word limits.
Haha lol, very nice. But I don't think this belongs in the singles and dating category ;)
44 is the only funny one
ur a loser!
When you get pulled over, say ';What's wrong, ossifer, there's no blood in my alcohol?';
2. When he asks why you were speeding, tell him you wanted to race.
3. When he talks to you, pretend you are deaf.
4. If he asks if you knew how fast you were going, say no, my speedometer only goes to......
5. Ask if you can see his gun.
6. When he says you aren't allowed, tell him I just wanted to see if mine was bigger.
7. Touch him.
8. When he asks why you were speeding, tell him you had to buy a hat.
9. Ask him where he bought his cool hat.
10. Refer to him by his first name.
11. Pretend you are gay and ask him out.
12. When he says no, cry.
13. If he says yes, accuse him of sexual harassment.
14. If the cop is a woman, tell her how ugly she is, but in a nice way.
15. If he asks you to step out of the car, automatically throw yourself on the hood.
16. When he asks you to spread them, tell him you don't go that way.
17.
When he puts the handcuffs on, say ';Usually my dates buy me dinner first';
18. Ask to be fingerprinted with candy, cause you don't like ink on your fingers.
19. After you sign the ticket and give it to him, say ';Oops! That's the wrong name.
';
20. Bribe him with donuts, and when he agrees, tell him sorry, I just ate the last one.
21. When he comes up to the car, say ';License and registration, please'; right when he says it.
22.
When he goes to read you your rights, sing ';La La La, I can't hear you!';
23. Trip and fall into him.
24. Accuse him of police brutality when he pushes you away.
25. Before you sign the ticket, pick your nose. You have to sign with his pen.
26. Chew on the pen, nervously.
27. Clean your ear with the pen.
28. If it's a click pen, take it apart and play with the spring.
29. Ask if he has a daughter. If he says yes, say I thought the name sounded familiar.....
30. Ask him if he ever worked in a prison. If he says yes, ask him how the plumbing was.
31. Act like you are retarded.
32. When he's telling you what you did wrong, start repeating him, quietly.
33. Mumble to yourself.
34.
When he tells you to stop, say what are you talkin about, DUDE?
35. Drive to Dunkin Donuts and say hmmm....only 5 of you here tonight.......
36. Ask if they know how to make the donuts.
37.
When he comes to the car, say I have a badge just like yours!
38. Ask if he watches Cops.
39. Ask if ever watched Cop Rock.
40. Giggle if he did.
41. Talk to your hand.
42. Ask if he knows somone named Rosy Palm and her Five Favorite Friends.
43. Accuse him of Sexual Harassment if he does.
44. When he frisks you, say You missed a spot, and grin.
45. When he asks to inspect your car, say there is no alcohol in my car, sir, the last cop got it.
46. Try to sell him your car.
47. Ask if you can buy his car.
48. If he takes you to the station, Ask to sit in front.
49. Play with the siren.
50. If you know him, say you had his wife for dinner.
51. If you don't know him, ask if you can have his wife for dinner. Oops...I meant OVER for dinner
52. Ask if he ever had pu-tang er.
53. If he asks what it is, point at him and giggle.
54. If there is someone else in the car, talk to each other in tongues.
55. When he acts confused, keep talking, look at him and laugh.
56. When you are in the back, touch his neck through the fencing.
57. Turn your head and whistle.
58. When he pulls out his night stick, say what you gonna do with that.
59. If you are female, say I don't do that on the first date.
60. If he sticks you in the back of the car, cower in the corner, suck your thumb, and whine.
61.
Stare at his lights and say ';Look at the pretty colors!';
62. Tell him you like men in uniform.
63.
Ask if you can borrow his uniform for a Halloween party63 ways to make a cop mad..? ?
HAHAHAHA this is HILARIOUS :)63 ways to make a cop mad..? ?
i love the pen one. My best friend does that. I love 58 and I love 61. How'd you paste this long list? i thought there was word limits.
Haha lol, very nice. But I don't think this belongs in the singles and dating category ;)
44 is the only funny one
ur a loser!
63 Ways To Piss Off A Cop?
63 Ways To Piss Off A Cop
63 Ways To Piss Off A Cop
1. When you get pulled over, say ';What's wrong, ossifer, there's no blood in my alcohol?';
2. When he asks why you were speeding, tell him you wanted to race.
3. When he talks to you, pretend you are deaf.
4. If he asks if you knew how fast you were going, say no, my speedometer only goes to......
5. Ask if you can see his gun.
6. When he says you aren't allowed, tell him I just wanted to see if mine was bigger.
7. Touch him.
8. When he asks why you were speeding, tell him you had to buy a hat.
9. Ask him where he bought his cool hat.
10. Refer to him by his first name.
11. Pretend you are gay and ask him out.
12. When he says no, cry.
13. If he says yes, accuse him of sexual harassment.
14. If the cop is a woman, tell her how ugly she is, but in a nice way.
15. If he asks you to step out of the car, automatically throw yourself on the hood.
16. When he asks you to spread them, tell him you don't go that way.
17. When he puts the handcuffs on, say ';Usually my dates buy me dinner first';
18. Ask to be fingerprinted with candy, cause you don't like ink on your fingers.
19. After you sign the ticket and give it to him, say ';Oops! That's the wrong name.';
20. Bribe him with donuts, and when he agrees, tell him sorry, I just ate the last one.
21. When he comes up to the car, say ';License and registration, please'; right when he says it.
22. When he goes to read you your rights, sing ';La La La, I can't hear you!';
23. Trip and fall into him.
24. Accuse him of police brutality when he pushes you away.
25. Before you sign the ticket, pick your nose. You have to sign with his pen.
26. Chew on the pen, nervously.
27. Clean your ear with the pen.
28. If it's a click pen, take it apart and play with the spring.
29. Ask if he has a daughter. If he says yes, say I thought the name sounded familiar.....
30. Ask him if he ever worked in a prison. If he says yes, ask him how the plumbing was.
31. Act like you are retarded.
32. When he's telling you what you did wrong, start repeating him, quietly.
33. Mumble to yourself.
34. When he tells you to stop, say what are you talkin about, DUDE?
35. Drive to Dunkin Donuts and say hmmm....only 5 of you here tonight.......
36. Ask if they know how to make the donuts.
37. When he comes to the car, say I have a badge just like yours!
38. Ask if he watches Cops.
39. Ask if ever watched Cop Rock.
40. Giggle if he did.
41. Talk to your hand.
42. Ask if he knows somone named Rosy Palm and her Five Favorite Friends.
43. Accuse him of Sexual Harassment if he does.
44. When he frisks you, say You missed a spot, and grin.
45. When he asks to inspect your car, say there is no alcohol in my car, sir, the last cop got it.
46. Try to sell him your car.
47. Ask if you can buy his car.
48. If he takes you to the station, Ask to sit in front.
49. Play with the siren.
50. If you know him, say you had his wife for dinner.
51. If you don't know him, ask if you can have his wife for dinner. Oops...I meant OVER for dinner
52. Ask if he ever had pu-tang er.
53. If he asks what it is, point at him and giggle.
54. If there is someone else in the car, talk to each other in tongues.
55. When he acts confused, keep talking, look at him and laugh.
56. When you are in the back, touch his neck through the fencing.
57. Turn your head and whistle.
58. When he pulls out his night stick, say what you gonna do with that.
59. If you are female, say I don't do that on the first date.
60. If he sticks you in the back of the car, cower in the corner, suck your thumb, and whine.
61. Stare at his lights and say ';Look at the pretty colors!';
62. Tell him you like men in uniform.
63. Ask if you can borrow his uniform for a Halloween party63 Ways To Piss Off A Cop?
those are some funny was to piss off a cop.. I am going to use some off those next time I get pulled over..
Thanks for the laughs63 Ways To Piss Off A Cop?
hahahahaha
Stand on their shoulders and aim. But make sure you don't get arrested for bleach of the police.
BAHAHAHAHAHA THATS HILARIOUS!!!!!!=D I WONDER WHAT WOULD HAPEN IF SUM1 REALLY DID THAT LOL =DDDDDDD
my favorite is ask to buy his car
funniest thing ive seen all night!
Brilliant ones again Martin.!!!
10/10 for a good laugh.!!!
Must try to remember some, lol.!!!
Cheers man.!!!
im going to try that if i get a ticket for driving fast
ha ha ha funny
ill try that next time i get pulled over
wow! 63 Ways To End Up In The Slammer! :P
kb
i hate when people say ur question is... its a dumb thing to say if u dont wanna read jokes and wanna answer questions go to like polictics section lmao
hehehe, funny
number 64 ask him when his mum and dad are getting married so you can send them a wedding card (think about it)
piss him off. you just made his shift.
nice ones
On and on and ariston! :D
you just made my night thanks!!!
OMG whata friggen awesome list!
This is fantastic, it reminds me when i got arrested,(uk), when they read me my rites and said ';anything you say will be used in a court of law against you'; i replied,,'; I was on a mission from God'; ,,,they re-arrested me for the same offence, and said the same thing ,but this time i replied , '; ooh-ah-ooh-whaawh, officers please stop hitting me'; they all laughed but did not write it down(funnily enough), This is true...
Your question is............ I think... 63 ways to see if the cop who is going to arrest you will laugh off you not being banged up for the night.
heehee, those are really funny!
that was so good!
63 Ways To Piss Off A Cop
1. When you get pulled over, say ';What's wrong, ossifer, there's no blood in my alcohol?';
2. When he asks why you were speeding, tell him you wanted to race.
3. When he talks to you, pretend you are deaf.
4. If he asks if you knew how fast you were going, say no, my speedometer only goes to......
5. Ask if you can see his gun.
6. When he says you aren't allowed, tell him I just wanted to see if mine was bigger.
7. Touch him.
8. When he asks why you were speeding, tell him you had to buy a hat.
9. Ask him where he bought his cool hat.
10. Refer to him by his first name.
11. Pretend you are gay and ask him out.
12. When he says no, cry.
13. If he says yes, accuse him of sexual harassment.
14. If the cop is a woman, tell her how ugly she is, but in a nice way.
15. If he asks you to step out of the car, automatically throw yourself on the hood.
16. When he asks you to spread them, tell him you don't go that way.
17. When he puts the handcuffs on, say ';Usually my dates buy me dinner first';
18. Ask to be fingerprinted with candy, cause you don't like ink on your fingers.
19. After you sign the ticket and give it to him, say ';Oops! That's the wrong name.';
20. Bribe him with donuts, and when he agrees, tell him sorry, I just ate the last one.
21. When he comes up to the car, say ';License and registration, please'; right when he says it.
22. When he goes to read you your rights, sing ';La La La, I can't hear you!';
23. Trip and fall into him.
24. Accuse him of police brutality when he pushes you away.
25. Before you sign the ticket, pick your nose. You have to sign with his pen.
26. Chew on the pen, nervously.
27. Clean your ear with the pen.
28. If it's a click pen, take it apart and play with the spring.
29. Ask if he has a daughter. If he says yes, say I thought the name sounded familiar.....
30. Ask him if he ever worked in a prison. If he says yes, ask him how the plumbing was.
31. Act like you are retarded.
32. When he's telling you what you did wrong, start repeating him, quietly.
33. Mumble to yourself.
34. When he tells you to stop, say what are you talkin about, DUDE?
35. Drive to Dunkin Donuts and say hmmm....only 5 of you here tonight.......
36. Ask if they know how to make the donuts.
37. When he comes to the car, say I have a badge just like yours!
38. Ask if he watches Cops.
39. Ask if ever watched Cop Rock.
40. Giggle if he did.
41. Talk to your hand.
42. Ask if he knows somone named Rosy Palm and her Five Favorite Friends.
43. Accuse him of Sexual Harassment if he does.
44. When he frisks you, say You missed a spot, and grin.
45. When he asks to inspect your car, say there is no alcohol in my car, sir, the last cop got it.
46. Try to sell him your car.
47. Ask if you can buy his car.
48. If he takes you to the station, Ask to sit in front.
49. Play with the siren.
50. If you know him, say you had his wife for dinner.
51. If you don't know him, ask if you can have his wife for dinner. Oops...I meant OVER for dinner
52. Ask if he ever had pu-tang er.
53. If he asks what it is, point at him and giggle.
54. If there is someone else in the car, talk to each other in tongues.
55. When he acts confused, keep talking, look at him and laugh.
56. When you are in the back, touch his neck through the fencing.
57. Turn your head and whistle.
58. When he pulls out his night stick, say what you gonna do with that.
59. If you are female, say I don't do that on the first date.
60. If he sticks you in the back of the car, cower in the corner, suck your thumb, and whine.
61. Stare at his lights and say ';Look at the pretty colors!';
62. Tell him you like men in uniform.
63. Ask if you can borrow his uniform for a Halloween party63 Ways To Piss Off A Cop?
those are some funny was to piss off a cop.. I am going to use some off those next time I get pulled over..
Thanks for the laughs63 Ways To Piss Off A Cop?
hahahahaha
Stand on their shoulders and aim. But make sure you don't get arrested for bleach of the police.
BAHAHAHAHAHA THATS HILARIOUS!!!!!!=D I WONDER WHAT WOULD HAPEN IF SUM1 REALLY DID THAT LOL =DDDDDDD
my favorite is ask to buy his car
funniest thing ive seen all night!
Brilliant ones again Martin.!!!
10/10 for a good laugh.!!!
Must try to remember some, lol.!!!
Cheers man.!!!
im going to try that if i get a ticket for driving fast
ha ha ha funny
ill try that next time i get pulled over
wow! 63 Ways To End Up In The Slammer! :P
kb
i hate when people say ur question is... its a dumb thing to say if u dont wanna read jokes and wanna answer questions go to like polictics section lmao
hehehe, funny
number 64 ask him when his mum and dad are getting married so you can send them a wedding card (think about it)
piss him off. you just made his shift.
nice ones
On and on and ariston! :D
you just made my night thanks!!!
OMG whata friggen awesome list!
This is fantastic, it reminds me when i got arrested,(uk), when they read me my rites and said ';anything you say will be used in a court of law against you'; i replied,,'; I was on a mission from God'; ,,,they re-arrested me for the same offence, and said the same thing ,but this time i replied , '; ooh-ah-ooh-whaawh, officers please stop hitting me'; they all laughed but did not write it down(funnily enough), This is true...
Your question is............ I think... 63 ways to see if the cop who is going to arrest you will laugh off you not being banged up for the night.
heehee, those are really funny!
that was so good!
63 ways to p*ss of a cop?
1. When you get pulled over, say ';What's wrong, ossifer, there's no blood in my alcohol?';
2. When he asks why you were speeding, tell him you wanted to race.
3. When he talks to you, pretend you are deaf.
4. If he asks if you knew how fast you were going, say no, my speedometer only goes to......
5. Ask if you can see his gun.
6. When he says you aren't allowed, tell him I just wanted to see if mine was bigger.
7. Touch him.
8. When he asks why you were speeding, tell him you had to buy a hat.
9. Ask him where he bought his cool hat.
10. Refer to him by his first name.
11. Pretend you are gay and ask him out.
12. When he says no, cry.
13. If he says yes, accuse him of sexual harassment.
14. If the cop is a woman, tell her how ugly she is, but in a nice way.
15. If he asks you to step out of the car, automatically throw yourself on the hood.
16. When he asks you to spread them, tell him you don't go that way.
17. When he puts the handcuffs on, say ';Usually my dates buy me dinner first';
18. Ask to be fingerprinted with candy, cause you don't like ink on your fingers.
19. After you sign the ticket and give it to him, say ';Oops! That's the wrong name.';
20. Bribe him with donuts, and when he agrees, tell him sorry, I just ate the last one.
21. When he comes up to the car, say ';License and registration, please'; right when he says it.
22. When he goes to read you your rights, sing ';La La La, I can't hear you!';
23. Trip and fall into him.
24. Accuse him of police brutality when he pushes you away.
25. Before you sign the ticket, pick your nose. You have to sign with his pen.
26. Chew on the pen, nervously.
27. Clean your ear with the pen.
28. If it's a click pen, take it apart and play with the spring.
29. Ask if he has a daughter. If he says yes, say I thought the name sounded familiar.....
30. Ask him if he ever worked in a prison. If he says yes, ask him how the plumbing was.
31. Act like you are retarded.
32. When he's telling you what you did wrong, start repeating him, quietly.
33. Mumble to yourself.
34. When he tells you to stop, say what are you talkin about, DUDE?
35. Drive to Dunkin Donuts and say hmmm....only 5 of you here tonight.......
36. Ask if they know how to make the donuts.
37. When he comes to the car, say I have a badge just like yours!
38. Ask if he watches Cops.
39. Ask if ever watched Cop Rock.
40. Giggle if he did.
41. Talk to your hand.
42. Ask if he knows somone named Rosy Palm and her Five Favorite Friends.
43. Accuse him of Sexual Harassment if he does.
44. When he frisks you, say You missed a spot, and grin.
45. When he asks to inspect your car, say there is no alcohol in my car, sir, the last cop got it.
46. Try to sell him your car.
47. Ask if you can buy his car.
48. If he takes you to the station, Ask to sit in front.
49. Play with the siren.
50. If you know him, say you had his wife for dinner.
51. If you don't know him, ask if you can have his wife for dinner. Oops...I meant OVER for dinner
52. Ask if he ever had pu-tang er.
53. If he asks what it is, point at him and giggle.
54. If there is someone else in the car, talk to each other in tongues.
55. When he acts confused, keep talking, look at him and laugh.
56. When you are in the back, touch his neck through the fencing.
57. Turn your head and whistle.
58. When he pulls out his night stick, say what you gonna do with that.
59. If you are female, say I don't do that on the first date.
60. If he sticks you in the back of the car, cower in the corner, suck your thumb, and whine.
61. Stare at his lights and say ';Look at the pretty colors!';
62. Tell him you like men in uniform.
63. Ask if you can borrow his uniform for a Halloween party63 ways to p*ss of a cop?
Wow those are excellent. Thanks for sharing. Have a star.63 ways to p*ss of a cop?
Excellent
Brilliant list hun....pmsl
haha. i like 11.
Some were cute...I didn't get past 30 though... I do want to give you some advice on numbers 25-28, you aren't actually using his pen. The cop has two pens, one for his use and one for yours. So the pen you are picking your nose with and that is in your ear or you are chewing on has been used by EVERY other driver he has pulled over, imagine what is on that pen. And it doesn't bother him, his pen is safe in his pocket..
good ones
here are afew more I did accidently that is:
pulled over for spot check on car and asked to turn my left indicator on I did but he said it would help if you put ignition on! Ops
Then asked during same spot check to now put full beam on to which my reply was ';Where is that never used it';
His reply was car ok go home get out the maual and read how your bloody car works madam!!!!
Daughters in back crawling under seat in embarrasment and left the police falling about with laughter oh the shame!!!!lol
that is cool. sure he's gonna p*ss
star for u
i wanna try some of them.
This is so good they should make a movie about it!
i've written everyone down i'm going to use them!
lol..these are great..thanks for sharing them : )
very good you can have a star
hahaha love it!!!
That is a brilliant list. I like those. Have a star. Thank you.
well done hun great list. ive taught you well
starred
FUNNY. but i like chatting them up it's so funny. bless them.
good ones m
Lol , that was so funny , totally worth reading !! Thanks ... oh and I gave you a *star* !
thanx for the giggle!
ill be passing these on to my friends very funny!
Question how do they get the holes in doughnuts....?
or dont i wanna know.....!
hahaha some of these I have tried myself, no wonder I have a wanted pic in the police station j/k lmao....star!
Hehe well you could also just pull down your trousers and take a leek on him, or even cheekier, turn around and take a dump on his shoes :D
Star for you-they were brill hun-
Last week i parked outside the shop on a zig-zag-a cop came and told me to move it-he said i could put 3 points on your license for that-i said no you cant-i havent got a licence!!xxhehe
haha those are funny! :)
Have a star! *-*
and that is when he arrests you..
thats hilarious
luved it!
Good list!!
The best way to p*ss off a cop is to be very nice and polite to them. It really confuses them!!
Good list
nice one. have a star
Exactly how many of these do you hae experience with?
fatastic
2. When he asks why you were speeding, tell him you wanted to race.
3. When he talks to you, pretend you are deaf.
4. If he asks if you knew how fast you were going, say no, my speedometer only goes to......
5. Ask if you can see his gun.
6. When he says you aren't allowed, tell him I just wanted to see if mine was bigger.
7. Touch him.
8. When he asks why you were speeding, tell him you had to buy a hat.
9. Ask him where he bought his cool hat.
10. Refer to him by his first name.
11. Pretend you are gay and ask him out.
12. When he says no, cry.
13. If he says yes, accuse him of sexual harassment.
14. If the cop is a woman, tell her how ugly she is, but in a nice way.
15. If he asks you to step out of the car, automatically throw yourself on the hood.
16. When he asks you to spread them, tell him you don't go that way.
17. When he puts the handcuffs on, say ';Usually my dates buy me dinner first';
18. Ask to be fingerprinted with candy, cause you don't like ink on your fingers.
19. After you sign the ticket and give it to him, say ';Oops! That's the wrong name.';
20. Bribe him with donuts, and when he agrees, tell him sorry, I just ate the last one.
21. When he comes up to the car, say ';License and registration, please'; right when he says it.
22. When he goes to read you your rights, sing ';La La La, I can't hear you!';
23. Trip and fall into him.
24. Accuse him of police brutality when he pushes you away.
25. Before you sign the ticket, pick your nose. You have to sign with his pen.
26. Chew on the pen, nervously.
27. Clean your ear with the pen.
28. If it's a click pen, take it apart and play with the spring.
29. Ask if he has a daughter. If he says yes, say I thought the name sounded familiar.....
30. Ask him if he ever worked in a prison. If he says yes, ask him how the plumbing was.
31. Act like you are retarded.
32. When he's telling you what you did wrong, start repeating him, quietly.
33. Mumble to yourself.
34. When he tells you to stop, say what are you talkin about, DUDE?
35. Drive to Dunkin Donuts and say hmmm....only 5 of you here tonight.......
36. Ask if they know how to make the donuts.
37. When he comes to the car, say I have a badge just like yours!
38. Ask if he watches Cops.
39. Ask if ever watched Cop Rock.
40. Giggle if he did.
41. Talk to your hand.
42. Ask if he knows somone named Rosy Palm and her Five Favorite Friends.
43. Accuse him of Sexual Harassment if he does.
44. When he frisks you, say You missed a spot, and grin.
45. When he asks to inspect your car, say there is no alcohol in my car, sir, the last cop got it.
46. Try to sell him your car.
47. Ask if you can buy his car.
48. If he takes you to the station, Ask to sit in front.
49. Play with the siren.
50. If you know him, say you had his wife for dinner.
51. If you don't know him, ask if you can have his wife for dinner. Oops...I meant OVER for dinner
52. Ask if he ever had pu-tang er.
53. If he asks what it is, point at him and giggle.
54. If there is someone else in the car, talk to each other in tongues.
55. When he acts confused, keep talking, look at him and laugh.
56. When you are in the back, touch his neck through the fencing.
57. Turn your head and whistle.
58. When he pulls out his night stick, say what you gonna do with that.
59. If you are female, say I don't do that on the first date.
60. If he sticks you in the back of the car, cower in the corner, suck your thumb, and whine.
61. Stare at his lights and say ';Look at the pretty colors!';
62. Tell him you like men in uniform.
63. Ask if you can borrow his uniform for a Halloween party63 ways to p*ss of a cop?
Wow those are excellent. Thanks for sharing. Have a star.63 ways to p*ss of a cop?
Excellent
Brilliant list hun....pmsl
haha. i like 11.
Some were cute...I didn't get past 30 though... I do want to give you some advice on numbers 25-28, you aren't actually using his pen. The cop has two pens, one for his use and one for yours. So the pen you are picking your nose with and that is in your ear or you are chewing on has been used by EVERY other driver he has pulled over, imagine what is on that pen. And it doesn't bother him, his pen is safe in his pocket..
good ones
here are afew more I did accidently that is:
pulled over for spot check on car and asked to turn my left indicator on I did but he said it would help if you put ignition on! Ops
Then asked during same spot check to now put full beam on to which my reply was ';Where is that never used it';
His reply was car ok go home get out the maual and read how your bloody car works madam!!!!
Daughters in back crawling under seat in embarrasment and left the police falling about with laughter oh the shame!!!!lol
that is cool. sure he's gonna p*ss
star for u
i wanna try some of them.
This is so good they should make a movie about it!
i've written everyone down i'm going to use them!
lol..these are great..thanks for sharing them : )
very good you can have a star
hahaha love it!!!
That is a brilliant list. I like those. Have a star. Thank you.
well done hun great list. ive taught you well
starred
FUNNY. but i like chatting them up it's so funny. bless them.
good ones m
Lol , that was so funny , totally worth reading !! Thanks ... oh and I gave you a *star* !
thanx for the giggle!
ill be passing these on to my friends very funny!
Question how do they get the holes in doughnuts....?
or dont i wanna know.....!
hahaha some of these I have tried myself, no wonder I have a wanted pic in the police station j/k lmao....star!
Hehe well you could also just pull down your trousers and take a leek on him, or even cheekier, turn around and take a dump on his shoes :D
Star for you-they were brill hun-
Last week i parked outside the shop on a zig-zag-a cop came and told me to move it-he said i could put 3 points on your license for that-i said no you cant-i havent got a licence!!xxhehe
haha those are funny! :)
Have a star! *-*
and that is when he arrests you..
thats hilarious
luved it!
Good list!!
The best way to p*ss off a cop is to be very nice and polite to them. It really confuses them!!
Good list
nice one. have a star
Exactly how many of these do you hae experience with?
fatastic
Hey all! I was reading a poem, and I'm trying to figure out this one line. little help?
The line that reads: I've got the sanity of Rosemary Kennedy before lobotomy. (down near the bottom)
Does that mean insane or sane? Your thoughts of this poem would ne great! THANKS!!
The lovesick bird bares its burden to the mass
with it's heart on its tongue it longs for a single whistle back
who clipped your wings little bird?
Its soul is the new frontier
waiting for something...anything to settle there
what clipped your wings you little thing
turn your stumbling blocks into stepping stones
you think you're too old?
you are mistaken my friend
for no one grows old by merely living a number of years
you grow old when you desert your ideals
your wings will grow back
just give it time
just consider it one more mountain to climb
-------
I鈥檝e got the sanity of Rosemary Kennedy before lobotomy
And I鈥檓 the greatest threat to my own health
But how can you blame me
I wonder why I don鈥檛 see more people going crazy reading about the news every day
Getting sick of feeling limp and useless
Oh tell me what the use is
The tortured soul I can save
鈥楥ause if you leave me alone with my mind
You鈥檙e gonna dig my grave
--------
opposites attract, and the harmony is so sweet.
but there's one thing I'd like now and then
and that's....some unisonHey all! I was reading a poem, and I'm trying to figure out this one line. Little help?
A lobotomy is neurosurgical procedure- so they are implying ';insanity';Hey all! I was reading a poem, and I'm trying to figure out this one line. Little help?
hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm???
Rosemary was JFK's sister who was lobotomized as a treatment for schizophrenia.
Since you ';know'; who she was and what the procedure entailed, I fail to see your problem. The severe mood swings were preferable to the mental and physical handicaps which left her institutionalised in the days before Rauwolfia serpentina and lithium treatments that enabled people to live normal lives with her condition. Even psychiatric diagnosis had barely begun to emerge from the Dark Ages then, and we may forever speculate about her precise axis.
Does that mean insane or sane? Your thoughts of this poem would ne great! THANKS!!
The lovesick bird bares its burden to the mass
with it's heart on its tongue it longs for a single whistle back
who clipped your wings little bird?
Its soul is the new frontier
waiting for something...anything to settle there
what clipped your wings you little thing
turn your stumbling blocks into stepping stones
you think you're too old?
you are mistaken my friend
for no one grows old by merely living a number of years
you grow old when you desert your ideals
your wings will grow back
just give it time
just consider it one more mountain to climb
-------
I鈥檝e got the sanity of Rosemary Kennedy before lobotomy
And I鈥檓 the greatest threat to my own health
But how can you blame me
I wonder why I don鈥檛 see more people going crazy reading about the news every day
Getting sick of feeling limp and useless
Oh tell me what the use is
The tortured soul I can save
鈥楥ause if you leave me alone with my mind
You鈥檙e gonna dig my grave
--------
opposites attract, and the harmony is so sweet.
but there's one thing I'd like now and then
and that's....some unisonHey all! I was reading a poem, and I'm trying to figure out this one line. Little help?
A lobotomy is neurosurgical procedure- so they are implying ';insanity';Hey all! I was reading a poem, and I'm trying to figure out this one line. Little help?
hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm???
Rosemary was JFK's sister who was lobotomized as a treatment for schizophrenia.
Since you ';know'; who she was and what the procedure entailed, I fail to see your problem. The severe mood swings were preferable to the mental and physical handicaps which left her institutionalised in the days before Rauwolfia serpentina and lithium treatments that enabled people to live normal lives with her condition. Even psychiatric diagnosis had barely begun to emerge from the Dark Ages then, and we may forever speculate about her precise axis.
Can you teach someone how to whistle with two fingers in the mouth, (Real Loud)?
I can whistle, but, not real loud. I would love to hear how it's done, but, I need more info than stick 2 fingers in your mouth and blow. Where do the fingers go, which shape should I try to make of my mouth, what to do with the tongue, how hard do you blow. Who ever can describe it to the point that a high pitched whistle comes out of my mouth gets the 10 points and my sincere gratitude!Can you teach someone how to whistle with two fingers in the mouth, (Real Loud)?
if you learn. Please teach me! lol
- Leslie %26lt;3Can you teach someone how to whistle with two fingers in the mouth, (Real Loud)?
I always wanted to be able to do this too.
nope I cant do it either
I had someone try to teach me in person before but I could never do it.
your fingers go right under your tongue but close to the tip of your tongue.
if you learn. Please teach me! lol
- Leslie %26lt;3Can you teach someone how to whistle with two fingers in the mouth, (Real Loud)?
I always wanted to be able to do this too.
nope I cant do it either
I had someone try to teach me in person before but I could never do it.
your fingers go right under your tongue but close to the tip of your tongue.
When people put their fingers in their mouth to whistle - what are they doing with their fingers?
Are they squeezing their tongue? pressing down on the bottom of thier mouth - what?
Because i have been attempting it and i have no idea how to do it.
I thought perhaps where you put your fingers had something to do with it.When people put their fingers in their mouth to whistle - what are they doing with their fingers?
I'm sure the fingers do have something to do with it.
Like you I've tried and failed, just ended up coughing like mad with dribble everywhere.What are the pros and cons of hosting the Olympics in a city new hair styles
Because i have been attempting it and i have no idea how to do it.
I thought perhaps where you put your fingers had something to do with it.When people put their fingers in their mouth to whistle - what are they doing with their fingers?
I'm sure the fingers do have something to do with it.
Like you I've tried and failed, just ended up coughing like mad with dribble everywhere.
Any comment?
FINAL FLIGHT OF LIGHT
sunday morning.
your voice slid a slice of light
into my eyes,
your smile dusted the debris
of memos and bills
off my shoulders.
and i wished the time
to stand still
so that i could cling
to the tender laughter
in your eyelashes;
so that i could lay my head
on your tiny thighs
and listen to the riddles
rivuleting from your tongue.
riddles that yesterday
were rattled and clipped
by the anger that oozed
from my eyes, mouth, and fist 鈥?br>
a beast that refused the warm breeze
brought by the sea of your why鈥檚.
a, how i wished i could tie the sun
and lift it above the hills
a little longer 鈥?br>
i still would like to play with you
to annoy you, to say sorry,
and to sleep embracing you,
my child. but the dusk
has already fluffed its wings, the wind
has whistled the final flight of light.Any comment?
that was very deep and powerful....it uplifted me in my time of need. you should get it published.Any comment?
I'd like to see this in the 'poem of the month' at myverdict.net
Humm, some fresh blood surging into the poetry category, including you. I found this poem delightful in parts, shocking in others, and when they first collided, surprised at the change of voice so swift.
The last stanza shows your capacity for writing. Absolutely lovely. Also, ';how i wished....a little longer ---'; Beautiful.
I wish to go through this stanza by stanza but this seems to me like the kind of poem where you were so in the moment and could recapture. I'd love to see you go at this again more incisively, especially in the middle.
the only stanzas that didn't work/confounded me a bit started/ended with from ';riddles'; to ';your why's.'; Would love to sit down with you over them.
Very nice work, I thought. Thanks for sharing this. Don't stop.
reduce it to this - make these into haiku
it works much better - please give me partial credit if you publish this.
i could tie the sun
lifting it above the hills
a little longer
I like this poem, it was emotionally deep. It's about a parent who didn't have time for their child yesterday, but realizes today the joy that was lost. Even today does not seem long enough to baste in the love and innocence of your child.
Your poem sounds a bit tragic at the end. You say the wind has whistled the final flight of light. That sounds like a permanent ending.
I would say to you that there is always tomorrow to once again live and love. Even in a child's death, there is joy and strength from the remembrance of gifts bestowed upon you in this mortal realm. As a believer in God I look forward to re-union.
...but back to the poem. For the most part it flowed nicely in my mind. Areas that bothered my poetic soul a bit were ';slid a slice'; and ';laughter in your eyelashes.'; ';Slid a slice of light'; makes light seem static rather than flowing, beaming, brilliant, glowing. Ironically, ';laughter in your eyelashes'; seem to give movement to those static hairs.
...again a very fine poem. As a parent I can identify with it. Keep on writing.
sunday morning.
your voice slid a slice of light
into my eyes,
your smile dusted the debris
of memos and bills
off my shoulders.
and i wished the time
to stand still
so that i could cling
to the tender laughter
in your eyelashes;
so that i could lay my head
on your tiny thighs
and listen to the riddles
rivuleting from your tongue.
riddles that yesterday
were rattled and clipped
by the anger that oozed
from my eyes, mouth, and fist 鈥?br>
a beast that refused the warm breeze
brought by the sea of your why鈥檚.
a, how i wished i could tie the sun
and lift it above the hills
a little longer 鈥?br>
i still would like to play with you
to annoy you, to say sorry,
and to sleep embracing you,
my child. but the dusk
has already fluffed its wings, the wind
has whistled the final flight of light.Any comment?
that was very deep and powerful....it uplifted me in my time of need. you should get it published.Any comment?
I'd like to see this in the 'poem of the month' at myverdict.net
Humm, some fresh blood surging into the poetry category, including you. I found this poem delightful in parts, shocking in others, and when they first collided, surprised at the change of voice so swift.
The last stanza shows your capacity for writing. Absolutely lovely. Also, ';how i wished....a little longer ---'; Beautiful.
I wish to go through this stanza by stanza but this seems to me like the kind of poem where you were so in the moment and could recapture. I'd love to see you go at this again more incisively, especially in the middle.
the only stanzas that didn't work/confounded me a bit started/ended with from ';riddles'; to ';your why's.'; Would love to sit down with you over them.
Very nice work, I thought. Thanks for sharing this. Don't stop.
reduce it to this - make these into haiku
it works much better - please give me partial credit if you publish this.
i could tie the sun
lifting it above the hills
a little longer
I like this poem, it was emotionally deep. It's about a parent who didn't have time for their child yesterday, but realizes today the joy that was lost. Even today does not seem long enough to baste in the love and innocence of your child.
Your poem sounds a bit tragic at the end. You say the wind has whistled the final flight of light. That sounds like a permanent ending.
I would say to you that there is always tomorrow to once again live and love. Even in a child's death, there is joy and strength from the remembrance of gifts bestowed upon you in this mortal realm. As a believer in God I look forward to re-union.
...but back to the poem. For the most part it flowed nicely in my mind. Areas that bothered my poetic soul a bit were ';slid a slice'; and ';laughter in your eyelashes.'; ';Slid a slice of light'; makes light seem static rather than flowing, beaming, brilliant, glowing. Ironically, ';laughter in your eyelashes'; seem to give movement to those static hairs.
...again a very fine poem. As a parent I can identify with it. Keep on writing.
How can i whistle loudly without using fingers?
So i read online and ive seen videos explaining how to do this but i cant get it. So i hide my teeth covering top and bottom with my lips and i put my tongue to the top of my lips on the inside and blow but i hear nothing...
I dont know if it would make a difference but i can barely whistle normally making the O with your lips.How can i whistle loudly without using fingers?
use a whistle.
pull your tongue behind and either you suck in air or blow out you will be able to whistle, practice is more important.How can i whistle loudly without using fingers?
try putting your tongue at the bottom of your mouth or right in the middle or try sucking the air in and not out or in and out
I dont know if it would make a difference but i can barely whistle normally making the O with your lips.How can i whistle loudly without using fingers?
use a whistle.
pull your tongue behind and either you suck in air or blow out you will be able to whistle, practice is more important.How can i whistle loudly without using fingers?
try putting your tongue at the bottom of your mouth or right in the middle or try sucking the air in and not out or in and out
Umbridge Haters and HP Fans: How is this?
27 Ways to Annoy Dolores Umbridge
1. Offer her flies. Tell her they're good with ketchup.
2. Ask her if she's related to Trevor.
3. Follow close behind her all day, making clip-clopping noises with your tongue.
4. Ask her if she's met the handsome new divination teacher.
5. Tell her that Cornelius Fudge only hired her to scare small children.
6. Dye all her clothes black.
7. ...when she acts horrified, say you were only trying to help her, and that ';black is the new pink.';
8. Send her love notes, signing them as if they were from Cornelius Fudge.
9. Perpetually use the word ';umbrage.';
10. Remind her constantly that her ';Selwyn Family Heirloom'; contained the shreds of the most evil wizard of modern times.
11. Create your own Educational Decrees to contradict her's.
12. Make sure these said Decrees are identical to her own. Post them everywhere.
13. Turn all of her kittens into toads.
14. Talk in stage whispers about ';army meetings,'; ';Dumbledore,'; and ';Harry Potter.'; Should she confront you, stop talking, smile, and whistle innocently.
15. Tell her you're doing a Herbology project and want to know more about the plants in her natural habitat.
16. Buy her Weasleys' Wild-Fire Whiz-Bangs for Christmas.
17. Ask her if she's read the latest edition of the Quibbler. When she says no, offer her one.
18. When she's within earshot, announce loudly that Snape was a better headmaster than she was.
19. Or if you're feeling particularly daring, announce that Sir Cadogan would make a better headmaster.
20.Offer her a free membership with S.P.E.W.
21. Tell her that you didn't do your homework because ';progress for progress sake must be prohibited.';
22. Ask her if she wears that mask all the time, or just when she's teaching.
23. Ponder loudly whether the title ';Hogwarts High Inquisitor'; sounds quite as powerful as, say, ';Muggle Prime Minister.';
24. Present her with a voodoo doll with an uncanny resemblance to her, but just before giving it to her, stash it away, muttering, ';Oops, that one's Harry's...';
25. Buy her a pet Niffler.
26. Ask her why she didn't transform into a beautiful princess when she recieved her first kiss.
27. ...cut yourself off before you finish the question, look like you just realized something, then pat her arm consolingly and say, ';Don't worry. Not everyone is cut out for love.';
40 ways of irritating people who don't like Harry Potter
1. Relate everything they say to the Harry Potter books and/or movies.
2. Say they look like a Harry Potter character of the opposite gender.
3. Quote Dobby.
sorry 4th one missing....
5. Read out loud to them whenever they can't get away from you (Example: When in a car or an elevator). If you don't have a book with you, recite from memory.
6. Give them Harry Potter merchandise for their birthday and Christmas and demand that they keep it and treasure it forever.
7. Rewrite their favorite song with Harry Potter lyrics and sing it constantly.
8. Crowd their inbox with Harry Potter related e-mail and make sure the subjects are misleading.
9. Start singing a Sorting Hat song at random moments, pretend to forget what comes next, and ask if they know in a very loud voice.
10. Make them play Quidditch with you.
11. Give all of their friends Harry Potter related nicknames and act mortally offended when they don't know the history of their character.
12. Change your name to that of a Harry Potter character and start screaming when they don't address you as such in public.
13. Always speak with a British accent - especially if you aren't from the UK.
14. Refer to real places by Harry Potter names.
15. ...throw a fit if others don't use these names.
16. Draw round glasses and lightning bolt scars on every poster and picture you come across...in permanent marker.
17. Give long lectures about how the prophecy relates to every day life.
18. Give every room in your house a Harry Potter codename. ( Example: The living room becomes the Entrance Hall) and whenever someone asks you where something is, use these names.
19. Change them immediately if they figure out what the names refer to.
20. Constantly ask if they can see the thestrals too.
21. ...refuse to explain what a thestral is.
22. Say, ';Anything off the trolley, dear?'; in a fake British accent when offering anyone food.
23. Pretend you can do magic.
24. Constantly rearrange their furniture and blame it on indecisive house-elves.
25. Yell ';Get away from me, Death Eater!'; whenever they get near you.
26. Constantly compare them to Mrs. Figg.
27. ...laugh evilly if they ask who Mrs. Figg is.
28. Complain loudly about how your pictures don't move.
29. Whenever you're asked for advice, reply with ';Three turns should do it'; in a very serious voice.
30. Break any awkward silences by saying, ';How 'bout them ChudleyUmbridge Haters and HP Fans: How is this?
UMBRIDGE
Put a permanent swamp in Umbridges office... :)
Steal her blood-ink pen and write 'Umbridge is a Moron' until it appears on the back of your hand.. then go show her.
Invite her to a party to whom you have also invited Professor Trelawney, Hagrid, Grawp, centaurs, threstrals, house elves and other so called 'half-breeds'.
HARRY POTTER
Whisper about You-Know-Who all the time until they ask who he is.
Ask them if they have a bad case of U-NO-POO
While theyre asleep tatoo a lightning scar on their forehead. When they awake exclaim that they are the chose one..
If they annoy you, tell them to stop or youll put the cruciatus curse on them.
Instead of talking about footy, talk about quidditch.
Constantly quote everything Luna has ever said.. BLIBBERRING HUMDINGER!.. etc etc.
cant think of anything else...Umbridge Haters and HP Fans: How is this?
hhahahahahahahahha they all rock!!!
i hate umbridge!!!
They are all really good and funny.
Some great ideas, i might have to try a few
don't know any myself
annoying umbridge is easy give her a nice big potrait of centaurs
To irritate people who don't like Harry Potter
whenever they ask you if you've seen anything reply I've noticed the moon is very large tonight. (gosh I hope I didn't screw that up... it's from the first book.)
if something weird happens just tell them you suspect the nargls(sp?) did it.
always ask them if they have an extra pair of radish earrings.
every once in a while start talking about how much [insert girl character name here(for me it's Lavender Brown, but some people might like her)] is a sl*t and don't tell them who she is.
every time they get upset over a guy/girl tell them it's just like when the beast inside Harry roared, but the beast would soon purr for her/him too!
whenever they like somebody, but they can't get that person to like them tell them to ask Romilda Vane if she's got any more tricks.
haha thank you so much for this! I really liked the Weasly is our King one that other person posted also. all of yours were great! ha sorry I couldn't think of anything for Umbridge. =)
Long Live Harry Potter!
I love them!
ANNOYING UMBRIDGE:
Talk in a not understandable accent
Give her a gift of Weasley Wizz鈥檚 disguised as chocolate
Give her ten year old teeth breaking candy
When she tries to confiscate their stuff lick it and then hand it to her
Overflow the castle with beach balls
ANNOYING ANTI-HARRY POTTER FANS
Ask them loudly, all the time kind of broomstick they have and what quidditch team they go for
Make an I LOVE HARRY POTTER fan club and nag them until they join. Give them an ILHP badge and whenever you see them not wearing it scream at them
Do the same thing, except start a SPEW club
Recruit them to JKR's army- J-K Rowling's army.
That's all I can think of...
Umbridge Question:
Ask her constantly in a childish high pitched voice: 'How's ';Corney'; today?'
Harry Potter Question:
Annoy those who dislike the supremely awesome Harry Potter by constantly singing Wesley is our King, loud and proud.
Sorry, I'm not to good at this kind of thing.
my friend is a HUGE twilight fan so I....
Make her call me Moony
Insist that she looks like hermione
I bought her a time turner, and when ever things go wrong and ask her to turn it three times
Her nickname is Wormtail
I do use a fake british accent
I look up in the sky and randomyl scream ';OMG IT'S A THESTRAL';
We went to Kings cross over the summer and made her run into platform 9 and 3 quarters with me
I actually got the dark mark tatoo and bought HP glasses and ran around the mall screaming with my friend who was about to kill me ';HARRY HAS JOINED THE DARK LORD!';
yah what is she gonna do to me? throw glitter on me and go into spams and say she is getting a vision?
1. Offer her flies. Tell her they're good with ketchup.
2. Ask her if she's related to Trevor.
3. Follow close behind her all day, making clip-clopping noises with your tongue.
4. Ask her if she's met the handsome new divination teacher.
5. Tell her that Cornelius Fudge only hired her to scare small children.
6. Dye all her clothes black.
7. ...when she acts horrified, say you were only trying to help her, and that ';black is the new pink.';
8. Send her love notes, signing them as if they were from Cornelius Fudge.
9. Perpetually use the word ';umbrage.';
10. Remind her constantly that her ';Selwyn Family Heirloom'; contained the shreds of the most evil wizard of modern times.
11. Create your own Educational Decrees to contradict her's.
12. Make sure these said Decrees are identical to her own. Post them everywhere.
13. Turn all of her kittens into toads.
14. Talk in stage whispers about ';army meetings,'; ';Dumbledore,'; and ';Harry Potter.'; Should she confront you, stop talking, smile, and whistle innocently.
15. Tell her you're doing a Herbology project and want to know more about the plants in her natural habitat.
16. Buy her Weasleys' Wild-Fire Whiz-Bangs for Christmas.
17. Ask her if she's read the latest edition of the Quibbler. When she says no, offer her one.
18. When she's within earshot, announce loudly that Snape was a better headmaster than she was.
19. Or if you're feeling particularly daring, announce that Sir Cadogan would make a better headmaster.
20.Offer her a free membership with S.P.E.W.
21. Tell her that you didn't do your homework because ';progress for progress sake must be prohibited.';
22. Ask her if she wears that mask all the time, or just when she's teaching.
23. Ponder loudly whether the title ';Hogwarts High Inquisitor'; sounds quite as powerful as, say, ';Muggle Prime Minister.';
24. Present her with a voodoo doll with an uncanny resemblance to her, but just before giving it to her, stash it away, muttering, ';Oops, that one's Harry's...';
25. Buy her a pet Niffler.
26. Ask her why she didn't transform into a beautiful princess when she recieved her first kiss.
27. ...cut yourself off before you finish the question, look like you just realized something, then pat her arm consolingly and say, ';Don't worry. Not everyone is cut out for love.';
40 ways of irritating people who don't like Harry Potter
1. Relate everything they say to the Harry Potter books and/or movies.
2. Say they look like a Harry Potter character of the opposite gender.
3. Quote Dobby.
sorry 4th one missing....
5. Read out loud to them whenever they can't get away from you (Example: When in a car or an elevator). If you don't have a book with you, recite from memory.
6. Give them Harry Potter merchandise for their birthday and Christmas and demand that they keep it and treasure it forever.
7. Rewrite their favorite song with Harry Potter lyrics and sing it constantly.
8. Crowd their inbox with Harry Potter related e-mail and make sure the subjects are misleading.
9. Start singing a Sorting Hat song at random moments, pretend to forget what comes next, and ask if they know in a very loud voice.
10. Make them play Quidditch with you.
11. Give all of their friends Harry Potter related nicknames and act mortally offended when they don't know the history of their character.
12. Change your name to that of a Harry Potter character and start screaming when they don't address you as such in public.
13. Always speak with a British accent - especially if you aren't from the UK.
14. Refer to real places by Harry Potter names.
15. ...throw a fit if others don't use these names.
16. Draw round glasses and lightning bolt scars on every poster and picture you come across...in permanent marker.
17. Give long lectures about how the prophecy relates to every day life.
18. Give every room in your house a Harry Potter codename. ( Example: The living room becomes the Entrance Hall) and whenever someone asks you where something is, use these names.
19. Change them immediately if they figure out what the names refer to.
20. Constantly ask if they can see the thestrals too.
21. ...refuse to explain what a thestral is.
22. Say, ';Anything off the trolley, dear?'; in a fake British accent when offering anyone food.
23. Pretend you can do magic.
24. Constantly rearrange their furniture and blame it on indecisive house-elves.
25. Yell ';Get away from me, Death Eater!'; whenever they get near you.
26. Constantly compare them to Mrs. Figg.
27. ...laugh evilly if they ask who Mrs. Figg is.
28. Complain loudly about how your pictures don't move.
29. Whenever you're asked for advice, reply with ';Three turns should do it'; in a very serious voice.
30. Break any awkward silences by saying, ';How 'bout them ChudleyUmbridge Haters and HP Fans: How is this?
UMBRIDGE
Put a permanent swamp in Umbridges office... :)
Steal her blood-ink pen and write 'Umbridge is a Moron' until it appears on the back of your hand.. then go show her.
Invite her to a party to whom you have also invited Professor Trelawney, Hagrid, Grawp, centaurs, threstrals, house elves and other so called 'half-breeds'.
HARRY POTTER
Whisper about You-Know-Who all the time until they ask who he is.
Ask them if they have a bad case of U-NO-POO
While theyre asleep tatoo a lightning scar on their forehead. When they awake exclaim that they are the chose one..
If they annoy you, tell them to stop or youll put the cruciatus curse on them.
Instead of talking about footy, talk about quidditch.
Constantly quote everything Luna has ever said.. BLIBBERRING HUMDINGER!.. etc etc.
cant think of anything else...Umbridge Haters and HP Fans: How is this?
hhahahahahahahahha they all rock!!!
i hate umbridge!!!
They are all really good and funny.
Some great ideas, i might have to try a few
don't know any myself
annoying umbridge is easy give her a nice big potrait of centaurs
To irritate people who don't like Harry Potter
whenever they ask you if you've seen anything reply I've noticed the moon is very large tonight. (gosh I hope I didn't screw that up... it's from the first book.)
if something weird happens just tell them you suspect the nargls(sp?) did it.
always ask them if they have an extra pair of radish earrings.
every once in a while start talking about how much [insert girl character name here(for me it's Lavender Brown, but some people might like her)] is a sl*t and don't tell them who she is.
every time they get upset over a guy/girl tell them it's just like when the beast inside Harry roared, but the beast would soon purr for her/him too!
whenever they like somebody, but they can't get that person to like them tell them to ask Romilda Vane if she's got any more tricks.
haha thank you so much for this! I really liked the Weasly is our King one that other person posted also. all of yours were great! ha sorry I couldn't think of anything for Umbridge. =)
Long Live Harry Potter!
I love them!
ANNOYING UMBRIDGE:
Talk in a not understandable accent
Give her a gift of Weasley Wizz鈥檚 disguised as chocolate
Give her ten year old teeth breaking candy
When she tries to confiscate their stuff lick it and then hand it to her
Overflow the castle with beach balls
ANNOYING ANTI-HARRY POTTER FANS
Ask them loudly, all the time kind of broomstick they have and what quidditch team they go for
Make an I LOVE HARRY POTTER fan club and nag them until they join. Give them an ILHP badge and whenever you see them not wearing it scream at them
Do the same thing, except start a SPEW club
Recruit them to JKR's army- J-K Rowling's army.
That's all I can think of...
Umbridge Question:
Ask her constantly in a childish high pitched voice: 'How's ';Corney'; today?'
Harry Potter Question:
Annoy those who dislike the supremely awesome Harry Potter by constantly singing Wesley is our King, loud and proud.
Sorry, I'm not to good at this kind of thing.
my friend is a HUGE twilight fan so I....
Make her call me Moony
Insist that she looks like hermione
I bought her a time turner, and when ever things go wrong and ask her to turn it three times
Her nickname is Wormtail
I do use a fake british accent
I look up in the sky and randomyl scream ';OMG IT'S A THESTRAL';
We went to Kings cross over the summer and made her run into platform 9 and 3 quarters with me
I actually got the dark mark tatoo and bought HP glasses and ran around the mall screaming with my friend who was about to kill me ';HARRY HAS JOINED THE DARK LORD!';
yah what is she gonna do to me? throw glitter on me and go into spams and say she is getting a vision?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)